Sticking Together In Vinnieland
by Im-AcErBiC
Summary: When Vince decides to give the Superstars hell, they come up with a plan to blow him out of the water. Can they peacefully coexist? Or will their bickering bring their genious plan to a screeching halt? There will be lots of pairings.
1. Holy Adultery, Batman!

**Sticking Together In Vinnieland**

**Chapter One - Vince's Dream**

**A/N:** I was -somewhat- inspired to do this fic from a dream I had. The dream had -nothing- to do with any of the content in this fic. I'm not exactly sure how my mind came to this, but it just happened. I was also kind of inspired by a song. 'Here (In Your Arms)' by Hellogoodbye. The song also doesn't have anything to do with it. LOLz.

**List Of Superstars:** (Here are the ones I know of. Might be more added later.)

**John Cena**

**Edge**

**Undertaker**

**Kane**

**DX**

**Big Show**

**Carlito**

**Chris Masters**

**Ric Flair**

**Rob Van Dam**

**Shelton Benjamin**

**The Hardys**

**Finlay & Hornswoggle**

**Bobby Lashley**

**JBL**

**Chris Benoit**

**King Booker**

**Rey Mysterio**

**Randy Orton**

**Umaga & Estrada**

**Nitro & Mercury**

**CM Punk**

**Kevin Thorn**

**Sabu**

**Ron Simmons**

**Mr. Kennedy**

**Great Khali**

**Batista**

**Balls Mahoney**

**MVP**

**Miz**

**Sandman**

**Hardcore Holly**

**Snitsky**

**Gregory Helms**

**Kenny Dykstra**

**Test**

**Supercrazy**

**Viscera**

**William Regal**

**Vito**

**Mark Henry**

**The Divas:**

**Sharmell**

**Mickie James**

**Layla El**

**Ashley Massaro**

**Michelle McCool**

**Maria Kanellis**

**Kristal Marshall**

**Jillian Hall**

**Kelly Kelly**

**Torrie Wilson**

**Melina Perez**

**Victoria**

**Jazz**

**Ariel**

**Candice Michelle**

**Lita**

**Trish Stratus**

**Disclaimer:** I don't own the WWE or any of its employees. And, since I mentioned it in the A/N, I don't own that song either.

**Story Summary:** When Vince decides to give the Superstars hell, they come up with a plan to blow him out of the water. Can they peacefully co-exist? Or will their bickering bring their genious plan to a screeching halt? There will be lots of pairings.

**Chapter Summary:** Vince dreams of a brilliant idea to torture his employees.

!#$&()+

"No, damn it. I'm not hungry. I'd like to go to bed now," Vincent Kennedy McMahon yelled at his butler Paolo, who ran away scared.

Vince lagged up to his baseball field-sized bedroom, and dressed in his red satin pajamas, lazily rolling into his bed.

Ever since his wife had left him, Vince had been in a foul mood. He was bitter towards everyone and wanted to cause misery for anyone in his life.

Linda had said she was sick of his obsessive behavior, and preferred someone who was not so hard up. That was when she ran off to Mexico with the twenty-two-year-old pool boy.

Vince grimaced as if he had just swallowed a lemon at the thought. He plopped back in his bed, covering his entire body with his silk comforter.

It wasn't long until he drifted off into a deep sleep. The sad thoughts did not effect him normally. It made no impact on his sleep pattern.

It seemed like the first thing he saw in his dream was all of his Superstars, Divas and Extremists standing before him. They all looked angry, which made Vince smile.

"What are you all doing here?" Vince asked, confused.

"What the hell do you mean, McMahon? You asked us to come here," John Cena piped up. Vince ignored the WWE Champion, as he looked past the large group of Superstars to see where they were located.

Vince gasped at what he saw. _What a great idea!_ He thought to himself.

The epiphany was so groundbreaking, It woke Vince up.

"I have no time to sleep! I've gotta get this in the works!" He shouted to the air.

**A Few Days Later**

Vince's little 'project' was quite difficult to establish. It took millions of dollars and quite a few new employees. These employees were not wrestlers, though. They were contractors, advertisers, designers, mechanics and various other professionals.

Vince McMahon stood proudly outside of his lovely creation.

"Wait 'til they all get a load of this. They all think I'm crazy. Well, I'll show them crazy!" Vince yelled to himself. (A/N: He does that a lot)

"Mr. McMahon, everything is finished. We're all done here," a man said to him, emerging from Vince's newfound haven.

"Excellent. You know what that means?" Vince asked the man.

"We get a bonus?!" The man asked jokingly. This resulted in a frown from Vince. His trouble earned him a patented Billionaire Bitchslap.

"YOU'RE FIRED!!!" Vince replied thunderously, and the man ran away, obviously about to pee his pants.

"Nope, that's not what it means at all," Vince began, even though the man had already ran away.

"It means it's time to call my oh-so-loyal and trusted employees," he finished, laughing maniacally.

**A/N:** Yeah, I know. It sucks right now, but it'll get better. I promise :) Ciao!


	2. Assignments

**Sticking Together In Vinnieland**

**Chapter Two - Assignments**

**A/N:** Oh snapsky, what the hell could happen in this chapter? Anyways, I just finished watching that 'Raw Family Reunion' from last year(taped it). That Kane vs Umaga match where the loser had to leave Raw was...well it made me cry. But only because it was Kane who had to leave. The minute the Referee counted to three, there went my make-up lolz. Especially when the fans chanted 'Thank you Kane'. I was yelling that really loud and my parents were telling me to be quiet. : S Hehe, it was funny when he beat up the Highlanders. That was from the heart :P He was saying goodbye in his own special way. But he's on Smackdown. At least he's still in the WWE.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own the WWE or any Superstars or Divas.

**Chapter Summary:** The Superstars, Extremists, Divas and Vixens gather at Vince's new project site. What does Vince want them for?

!#$&()+

Gathering the Wrestlers at his new creation was easy for Vince. Mostly because he didn't have to do it personally, but also because was excited.

Vince could do nothing but smile as he saw their glum faces. They weren't going to enjoy this, but he sure was!

"What the hell is this about?" Edge asked, hands on his hips, looking annoyed.

"Ah. Glad you asked," Vince began, ignoring Edge's tone.

"I'd like you all to see my newest investment. It is one that is close to my heart, due to the fact that it will make you all miserable," Vince said, smiling and chuckling all the while, as if he'd politely greeted them all.

"Why would you want to make us miserable, Mr. McMahon?" Maria asked, in a confused, yet upbeat voice.

"Because I can. Now, I'd like you all to turn around," Vince replied, allowing his eyes to leave them and settle on what was behind them. They all were confused and angry, but turned around, nonetheless.

The sight that met their questioning eyes was a huge sign. It read 'Vinnieland', and behind it were the tops of roller coasters and other various amusement park rides.

Now, the wrestlers were extremely bewildered. All of them except Maria, who was giggling and looked incredibly excited.

"Mr. McMahon! That's so cool! You built a theme park so we could go there and have fun!" Maria squealed.

This made Vince laugh for a few minutes.

"Yeah right. No, this isn't for you to have fun. This is for me to have fun," Vince chuckled, trying to get over his laughing fit.

"What does this have to do with us?" Shelton Benjamin asked.

"Finally, a question worth answering. Where to begin?" Vince mumbled to himself.

"Well, seeing as how it's almost summertime, I figured I'd do a little something special for myself," Vince started.

"Oh God," Kane spoke up, knowing he was gonna torture them, somehow.

"Indeed. Well, I decided to open up this amusement park, cleverly named Vinnieland," Vince continued, head up high, as if he were the president or something.

"Cleverly?" Both of the Hardys asked, looking at each other.

"That's what I said, damn it. Anyway, inside of this amusement park is rides, a restaurant and even a hotel. There's a water park too. Believe me, this place is great," Vince said, basking in glory.

"So, again I ask, What the hell does this have to do with us?" Shelton said again.

"I'm getting to it. See, all of you will be staying at my amusement park for the rest of the summer. You'll have to live in it together. Obviously, that's what the hotel is for. There is no one else in there, it's just gonna be you guys. The rides are automatically running, but some of you will have to oversee operations and test ride them. There is a fully stocked restaurant, but you will have to prepare the food yourselves. You'll have to work together to keep this place up to snuff, so you'll practically be working here. Have fun!" Vince explained, topping it off with arrogance.

"What?!" The entire group yelled at him.

"That's _not_ cool," Carlito said.

"Well, get over it," Vince said, laughing to himself.

"You can't make us do this. And we're not going to," Trish Stratus said, arms crossed. For the first time ever, Lita agreed with her.

"Yeah. We may work for you in the WWE, but this is ridiculous. We're not gonna stay here for three months," she added.

"Well, since I said it's _almost_ summertime, it's more like three-and-a-half months. And yes, you will do this. Why? Because I said so. And if you refuse to take part in my little experiment, I will fire all of you faster than you can say 'championship'." Vince said, ending his statement with a snarl.

"You can't fire all of us. You'd have no Superstars. You can't run the WWE without us. You'd have nothing," Triple H retorted, sharing the thought of all the other Superstars.

"Oh, but you see, I have an entire back-up roster of free-agents. I won't hesitate to use them," Vince said with a smirk.

The entire group groaned, except for Maria. She just looked confused.

"I assume you've all changed your minds? Well then, time to give out the assignments," Vince commented.

"Assignments?" The Hardys repeated.

"Damn it, quit repeating everything I say. Yes, assignments. You all will be split into groups. Each group will be prompted to run a certain part of the park. Some of you will be in charge of cleaning the hotel. And some of you will be in charge of ride maintainence, and so on. So, let's begin. So, there's sixty-four of you? OK, here are the groups." Vince continued.

"John Cena, DX, Maria, Chris Masters, Gregory Helms, Finlay, Hornswoggle, Big Show and Rey Mysterio will be in charge of Thrill Ride Maintainence. Edge, Lita, the Undertaker, Kane, Ashley, RVD, Carlito, Torrie Wilson, Chris Benoit and Randy Orton will be in charge of the Water Park Ride Maintainence. Ric Flair, Shelton Benjamin, Jeff and Matt Hardy, JBL, King Booker, Sharmell, Sabu, Trish Stratus and Jazz will be in charge of cleaning the Hotel. Bobby Lashley, Johnny Nitro, Joey Mercury, CM Punk, Kelly Kelly, Kristal, Ron Simmons, Snitsky, Supercrazy and Vito will be in charge of cooking the food. Umaga, Armando Estrada, Kevin Thorn, Ariel, Mr. Kennedy, Candice Michelle, Batista, Melina, Balls Mahoney and Miz will be in charge of cleaning the restaurant. The remaining 14, Khali, MVP, Sandman, Hardcore Holly, Kenny Dykstra, Test, Viscera, William Regal, Mark Henry, Mickie James, Layla, Michelle McCool, Jillian Hall and Victoria will be in charge of cleaning up the outside area of the park. Those are your groups. Your things have already been brought and sent to your rooms. Here are the room assignments. You are to strictly follow these arrangements. No switching roommates or adding more to a room. Roommates are chosen within groups. Group 1. Room 1: John Cena and Rey Mysterio. Room 2: DX. Room 3: Finlay and Hornswoggle. Room 4: Chris Masters and Gregory Helms. Room 5: Maria and the Big Show. Group 2. Room 6: Edge and Lita. Room 7: Carlito and Torrie Wilson. Room 8: Kane and Ashley. Room 9: The Undertaker and Chris Benoit. Room 10: RVD and Randy Orton. Group 3. Room 11: The Hardys. Room 12: King Booker and Sharmell. Room 13: Shelton Benjamin and Jazz. Room 14: JBL and Trish Stratus. Room 15: Ric Flair and Sabu. Group 4. Room 16: Nitro and Mercury. Room 17: Bobby Lashley and Kristal. Room 18: Ron Simmons and Vito. Room 19: CM Punk and Kelly Kelly. 20: Snitsky and Supercrazy. Group 5. Room 21: Umaga and Armando Estrada. Room 22: Kevin Thorn and Ariel. Room 23: Balls Mahoney and Miz. Room 24: Batista and Melina. Room 25: Mr. Kennedy and Candice Michelle. Group 6. Room 26: Kenny Dykstra and Mickie James. Room 27: Khali and William Regal. Room 28: Viscera and Mark Henry. Room 29: MVP and Test. Room 30: Hardcore Holly and Michelle McCool. Room 31: Sandman and Victoria. Room 32: Layla and Jillian Hall. These instructions, as well as job instructions are posted on a huge bulletin board inside the park. You will each get a map to find your way around, but eventually you won't need them. Your actions will be recorded by hidden cameras located at random points inside the park. This is gonna be so fun!!!" Vince explained, feeling excited.

"If you aren't happy with your roommates, well that's just too damn bad. You'll all be forced to live together. Most of you probably won't get along, which will make it even more fun for me. It'll be so entertaining to see who will make it out alive," Vince added, giggling like a little girl.

"Alright, see you in three-and-a-half months!" Vince said, sliding into his limo and driving off into the distance.

"Sooo, what now?" Johnny Nitro asked the group.

"I guess we just go inside and settle into our rooms," Kelly Kelly suggested. At her comment, all of the wrestlers entered the park.

This was going to be the longest and most interesting 3 months of their lives.

**A/N:** OH NOZ. What could happen next? Well the Superstars settle into their rooms in the next chapter. Who will fight? Who will hook up? Will they make it through another hour in each other's company, let alone 3 months? You'll have to keep reading to find out.


	3. Moving In

**Sticking Together In Vinnieland**

**Chapter Three - Moving In**

**A/N:** Well, here's where all the Superstars move into their rooms. Oh snap, how will they react to their roommates? The scenes are in sequential order as I listed the rooms in the last chapter. For example, Room 1 will be shown first. Room 2 will be second and Room 3 will be third, so...yeah!

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Vince McMahon, The WWE, or the wrestlers.

**Chapter Summary:** The Superstars move into their new temporary home. How will they take to their new surroundings?

!#$&()+

The walk through the rather large park was difficult and exhausting. Some Superstars thought they'd be funny and suggest an extremely out of the way route to the hotel. It was mostly DX.

"This is taking forever!" Candice Michelle complained, breathing heavily like everyone else.

"I swear, if you do that whining thing one more time, I'll beat your ass right here!" Jazz yelled in her oddly man-like voice.

"Like to see you try," Torrie Wilson spoke up, stepping to the aid of her friend.

"Good thing you came Torrie. God knows Candice can't fend for herself," an agitated Edge spat at the unfolding scene.

"Butt out, Premachar Superstar," Triple H laughed.

"Coming from the guy whose nose makes it to the arena five minutes before him," Edge shot back.

"Everybody shut the hell up," Kane said in a warning voice.

"We need to stop fighting if we plan to survive this. We can't let Vince win," CM Punk said, deciding to be the voice of reason.

"Like that'll happen. Most of us hate each other. You can't really expect us to just start holding hands and break into the chorus of 'Kumbaya'," Mr. Kennedy said, crossing his arms.

"I expect us to reach an understanding. Sure, none of us are best friends, and never will be. But if we're gonna get through this, we need to work together to shove it in Vince's face. We gotta get him back," CM Punk replied.

"What is this? The Breakfast Club?" JBL asked, exasperated.

"The fact that you know what the Breakfast Club is scares me a little," Maria spoke up, acting as if she'd just come up with a witty comeback.

"Bite me, fruit cake Barbie," JBL retorted.

"Don't blame her for your odd taste for 80's teen movies," John Cena chuckled.

"Did I just say shut the hell up? I could've swore I just said shut the hell up," Kane repeated.

"You know, CM Punk's got a point," said a voice from a very unlikely source. It was Melina.

"Have you been near the wacky tobacky, babe?" Asked Johnny Nitro.

"Oh shut up. I mean about getting Vince back for the hell he's putting us through. We could hatch a plan, or something. But we'd have to work together to pull it off," she said, thinking deeply.

"How about we stop the chit chat and find this hotel, before we all die of heat stroke?" Bobby Lashley suggested sarcastically.

**20 Minutes Later**

"Shut up Candice!" Jazz growled, turning to face the whiny brunnette.

"Ugh! Torrie, help!" Candice said, taking off running around the lobby of the hotel they'd just entered, as Jazz was now after her.

"What do you want me to do? Even I'm ready to kick your ass," Torrie said, sighing.

"Guess we should head upstairs," Trish said, taking a look around the room.

The color scheme was jungle-like. There was dark green wallpaper and the floors were wooden. There was a front desk, but no one behind it.

**Room 1: John Cena & Rey Mysterio**

John Cena breathed a sigh of relief, as he entered his room. Finally away from all the craziness. He felt a cool breeze meet his face, as he realized the room was air conditioned.

"Sweet," he sighed.

"You're telling me!" Said a voice from behind him.

"What up Rey-Rey?" John said, plopping down on his bed.

"Great, there's a candy machine downstairs!" Rey Mysterio said excitedly. John suddenly came crashing down from his day dream.

"Please tell me you didn't eat any of it!" John said gravely.

"Of course I did, holmes!" Rey yelled. John rolled his eyes and flopped back down on his bed. He knew what happened when Rey and sugar mixed. You thought Mickie James was psycho...

**Room 2: D Generation X**

"Hey Shawn, did ya bring it?" Triple H asked his friend, happily.

"Of course? But, uh. I forgot which pocket it was in," Shawn Michaels replied, looking disappointed.

"Well, just check all of your pockets," Triple H responded.

"But, I'm wearing cargo pants!" Shawn cried.

"Ugh," Triple H groaned. Finally, Shawn pulled out an aluminum can, with a green top.

"Found it!" Shawn said, pulling the cap off. He shook the bottle and began to spray the contents on the wall. It turned out to be spray-paint.

**Room 3: Finlay & Hornswoggle**

"Damn it, Little Bastard! Where did yeh hide my shellileigh?" Finlay asked his pint-sized partner.

"I didn't hide it. I haven't had it," Hornswoggle replied, jumping on the bed.

"Uh oh," Finlay said, fearing it'd fallen into the wrong hands.

**Room 4: Gregory Helms & Chris Masters**

"Aren't you glad we found this?" Gregory Helms asked his roommate and friend, Chris Masters.

"Yeah! This is fun," Chris replied, currently holding Finlay's lost shellileigh. They were taking turns hitting each other in the head with it.

**Room 5: Big Show & Maria**

"Ah, this is the life," Big Show said, relaxing on his California King-sized bed. Suddenly, he heard a pained moan from beneath him. He got up suddenly.

"OW! You were sitting on me!" His roommate, Maria, wept.

**Room 6: Edge & Lita**

"Edgy, baby? How are we gonna get through three months of being locked up with all these losers?" Lita asked in a whiny voice.

"We'll keep to ourselves," Edge said, rolling down the blinds on the window.

"You know I can't do that. You know I have self-control issues," Lita replied, with a sigh.

**Room 7: Carlito & Torrie Wilson**

"'Lito? Being here with Trish and I isn't going to bother you is it? I know you have a history with her," Torrie asked her boyfriend. Carlito forced his eyes away from her chest.

"Huh? Yeah, whatever," Carlito replied.

**Room 8: Kane & Ashley**

"Um, what are you doing?" Ashley asked her roommate, Kane. He was covering the windows with aluminum foil.

"It keeps the monsters out," he replied, not looking at her.

"OH! Let me help!" She yelled.

**Room 9: The Undertaker & Chris Benoit**

"You know," The Undertaker said in a low grumble, that startled Chris Benoit, and made him fall off his bed.

"What?!" Chris asked, annoyed.

"Nothing..." 'Taker replied, his voice still low.

**Room 10: RVD & Randy Orton**

"You shut up," RVD said, tiredly.

"No, you shut up!" Randy Orton replied, still full of energy.

"You're so energetic. It's probably because of those steroids you take. Don't you know drugs are bad for you?" RVD asked, as he took a puff off of his joint.

**Room 11: The Hardys**

"Tadaaa!" Jeff Hardy said. He had long since borrowed some spray-paint from DX and was painting on the walls of the room he shared with his brother.

"Cool! What is it?" Matt asked, confused at his brother's work of art.

"A green skittle..." Jeff replied. The only thing on the wall was a plain green circle.

**Room 12: King Booker & Queen Sharmell**

"My Queen. We have to spend three months locked up in this God-forsaken place. There's so many rogues and scallions running around here. 'Tis a sham. Such a poor way to treat...the King of the wulled!" King Booker shuddered, shaking his head.

"All hail King Bookhah!" Sharmell replied.

**Room 13: Shelton Benjamin & Jazz**

"AH! Somebody help me!" Came a scream from room 13. It belonged to Shelton Benjamin. Jazz had him in a Sleeper Hold.

"I'll teach you to call me a man!" Jazz yelled.

"Come look, everybody! Shelton's screaming like a girl!" Triple H said from the doorway.

**Room 14: JBL & Trish Stratus**

"You're so annoying!" Trish Stratus yelled to the man she was being forced to share a room with.

"All I asked was where you purchased your heart of silicone!" JBL replied, chuckling.

"I will throw you out of the window! Don't make me do it!" Trish screamed. Luckily, the Hardys showed up to hold her back. Just then, a person came sailing past their window.

**Room 15: Sabu & Ric Flair**

"Hey, 'Naitch! Watch this!" Sabu yelled to his roommate.

"You've jumped out of the window 20 times already!" Ric Flair stated.

**Room 16: Johnny Nitro & Joey Mercury**

"Hey I'm gonna go check on Mel, G," Johnny Nitro told his tag team partner, Joey Mercury.

"Dude, quit trying to sound like K-Fed! You are not black and neither is he!" Mercury responded, perturbed.

**Room 17: Bobby Lashley & Kristal**

"Hey Kristal," Bobby Lashley greeted his roommate, who he was not so disappointed to see.

"Hello for the 7th time, Bobby!" Kristal shot back.

"What are you doing?" Bobby asked her.

"Unpacking," she answered, not looking at him.

"Hey Kristal," Bobby said again.

"Ugh," Kristal said to herself.

**Room 18: Vito & Ron Simmons**

"Hey, Ron. Can you hand me my panty-hose?" Vito asked.

"Damn!" Came Ron Simmons' reply.

**Room 19: CM Punk & Kelly Kelly**

"OH MY GOD! Girl he is so fine," Kelly Kelly whispered to her friend on her cell phone. She was referring to CM Punk, her roommate, who had been without a shirt for some time.

"Kel? Can you help me find my shirt?" He asked her. Kelly had been hiding the shirt under he bed so he wouldn't put it back on.

"Sure, sweetie!" She replied.

**Room 20: Snitsky & Supercrazy**

"Ow!" Supercrazy yelled. He had been backflipping off his bed for about half-an-hour.

"That's not my fault..." Snitsky said.

"I am Super! I am Crazy! I am Supercrazy!" Supercrazy responded.

"I wonder if there are any toes around here..." Snitsky said, licking his lips.

**Room 21: Umaga & Armando Estrada**

"Umaga, you are the Samoan Bulldossser! Why are you trying on women's underpants?" Armando Estrada asked his client.

**Room 22: Kevin Thorn & Ariel**

"I think you should get down from there," Kevin Thorn said to his valet, the vampire, Ariel.

"I am fine," she said in a muffled voice. She was hanging upside down like a bat on the light fixture, which could not support her weight. She found this out when she crashed into the floor.

**Room 23: Miz & Balls Mahoney**

"Hoorah!" Miz yelled at random intervals. He was smuggling something out of his bag, which appeared to be food.

"Hey, Balls. Try some of this," Miz told his roommate, handing it to the Extremist, Balls Mahoney. When Balls took a bite, he obviously enjoyed it.

"What the hell?" Balls asked.

"Exactly," Miz replied.

"What is this?" Balls questioned, scarfing down the soupy substance.

"It's What The Hell Stew," Miz answered.

"You know what this needs? Balls Bologna! Made with Intestinal Fortitude! Man, you'll have everybody singing! My bologna has a first name, it's B-A-L-L-S," Mahoney sang.

**Room 24: Batista & Melina**

"Johnny, you know what Vince said. No switching roommates!" Melina Perez told her boy toy as he tried to get through the door.

"But you can't bunk with Batista. Not when you're with me!" He said, in an anguished, overdramatic voice. Melina rolled hr eyes, closing the door and locking it.

"He's annoying sometimes," Melina told her roomie, Batista.

"Why don't you tell him to go hump someone else's leg?" He asked her. Melina was about to shout a comeback his way, but didn't.

"Maybe I will," she replied.

**Room 25: Mr. Kennedy & Candice Michelle**

"Haha, go daddy!" Mr. Kennedy whistled, as he watched Candice Michelle dance slowly in a circle from his bed.

**Room 26: Kenny Dykstra & Mickie James**

"Oh my gosh! Don't you think this issue of WWE Magazine is the bomb? I think it is. They talk about The Iron Sheik's boots and Howard Finkel inventing the term 'Wrestlemania' and the first Royal Rumble and Umaga's face paint and the similarites between wrestling rules and football rules and Edge's love of Swedish Meatballs and the best Holy Shit pictures of 2006 and another guy named Randy Orton and The Red Rooster and Eric Bischoff's book and Captain Lou Albano's slide and 1995 and Tommy Dreamer and Khali's burrito eating contest and Maria driving stick and Mr. Kennedy looking like Einstein and new action figures and Hardcore Holly's back gash and Jeff Hardy's facial hair and Jimmy Wang Yang being Asian of the Year and WWE's Midget Division and that zombie guy in ECW and Kane's clone and Vito's dresses and John Cena mowing the grass and Jim Duggan grocery shopping and Carlito's sand and King Booker's feet and Bobby Lashley's love of cookies and...hey are you listening?" Mickie James rambled, referring to her roommate Kenny Dykstra.

He was, in fact, not listening. He had nodded off to sleep about an hour earlier.

**Room 27: William Regal & the Great Khali**

"You retarded old sap," Sir William Regal mumbled to himself, alluding to the Great Khali. Khali was shaving his armpits with William's razor, which was meant for his face.

**Room 28: Mark Henry & Viscera**

"Who ate all the Frito's?" Mark Henry yelled in anger.

"The World's Largest Love Machine needed some nourishment," Viscera said from his bed.

"Damn it," Mark replied.

**Room 30: Test & MVP**

"It's okay," Test said, rubbing the back of the sobbing Montel Vontavious Porter.

"Why do they keep calling me a Power Ranger?" MVP cried.

"Well, they do have a point," Test replied with a snicker.

**Room 31: Hardcore Holly & Michelle McCool**

"I'm gonna pee in this corner? You mind? Good, knew you wouldn't" Hardcore Holly told his rommate, Michelle McCool, not giving her a chance to protest.

"Ew! That's gross! That's what a bathroom is for! Looks like you need to be taught a lesson," Michelle answered.

"Oh shut up, bitch," Holly replied, leaving Michelle floored by his nastiness.

**Room 32: Layla & Jillian Hall**

"Okay, listen up Layla. You make any noise to wake me up in the middle of the night, and I'll beat the shit out of you. Got it?" Jillian Hall said.

"What is your problem? You're just jealous that I won that Diva Search last year and the only thing you can win is a Most Likely to Marry A Fat Man award in high school. By the way, OH MY GOD! The Boogeyman is RIGHT BEHIND YOU!" Layla said, ending her tirade in a screaming, terrified voice.

"AHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!" Jillian screamed, running out of the room. Layla laughed and got up to lock the door.

This was certainly going to be tough.

**A/N:** LOLz, I though bunking Ron Simmons and Vito together would be funny. Well, interesting anyways. Next up is everyone's first day on the job.


	4. First Day On The Job

**Sticking Together In Vinnieland**

**Chapter 4 - First Day On The Job**

**A/N:** LOL, chapter's pretty much self explanatory. This will be the first day on the job for everyone Just in case you forgot, here's a briefing of each group.

**Group 1:**

John Cena

DX (Shawn Michaels & Triple H)

Maria

Chris Masters

Gregory Helms

Finlay

Hornswoggle

Big Show

Rey Mysterio

**Group 2:**

Edge

Lita

Undertaker

Kane

Ashley

RVD

Carlito

Torrie Wilson

Chris Benoit

Randy Orton

**Group 3:**

Ric Flair

Shelton Benjamin

The Hardys (Jeff & Matt)

JBL

King Booker

Sharmell

Sabu

Trish Stratus

Jazz

**Group 4:**

Bobby Lashley

Johnny Nitro

Joey Mercury

CM Punk

Kelly Kelly

Kristal

Ron Simmons

Supercrazy

Snitsky

Vito

**Group 5:**

Umaga

Armando Estrada

Kevin Thorn

Ariel

Mr. Kennedy

Candice Michelle

Batista

Melina

Balls Mahoney

Miz

**Group 6:**

Khali

MVP

Sandman

Hardcore Holly

Kenny Dykstra

Test

Viscera

William Regal

Mark Henry

Mickie James

Layla

Michelle McCool

Jillian Hall

Victoria

**Disclaimer:** I don't own any wrestlers or Vince McMahon or the WWE.

**Chapter Summary:** Will any of the Superstars make it through their first day on the job?

!#$&()+

**Group 1**

"Hey, Rey. What does this button do?" Maria asked her Latino friend, who was still hyped up on sugar.

"Maybe you shouldn't touch that," John Cena told Maria, who frowned.

"Why?" Maria asked.

"Because you don't know what it does. Knowing Vince, he probably plotted our demise with just the push of a button. So, don't go pushing any suspicious looking buttons," John explained.

"How do I know if a button looks suspicious?" Maria asked, keenly interested. John sighed and rolled his eyes. Him and his group were currently in the main part of the park maintaining the rides. They were all wondering why self running rides needed human contact, but they certainly didn't wanted to tango with Vince McMahon, so they simply did as they were told.

"No comment," John said in response to Maria's question. They were currently surveying a large roller coaster entitled 'Razor Drop'.

"This is gay. Why do we have to maintain rides that pretty much maintain themselves?" Triple H stated the thought that was pretty much on everyone's mind.

"Well, they don't test ride themselves. Who wants to go first?" John Cena asked.

"Aw, hell no. I'm not getting on first. Someone else go ahead of me," Chris Masters blurted.

"I'm not getting on," Gregory Helms said as well.

"I'm not gonna fit in that thing," Big Show piped up.

"I'm afraid of heights!" Maria squealed.

"I'm not tall enough," Hornswoggle added.

"I'm not scared of this contraption! I love to fight!" Finlay shouted. With that, he got into the front seat.

"I'm always up for stuff like this!" Rey Mysterio said, hopping in beside Finlay. DX looked at each other and shrugged, deciding to occupy the second row of seats. John Cena smoothly persuaded Maria to get on beside him. She looked scared to death, but got on nonetheless.

"Well, since everyone else is getting on," Chris Masters said, and with that, he jumped into a fourth row seat. Gregory Helms sighed and joined him. The group of Superstars seated on the coaster simply stared at the contrast in nonriders. Only Hornswoggle and Big Show remained.

"I'm too big," the Big Show repeated.

"I'm too small," Hornswoggle added.

With that, the coaster began to take off at a slow speed. Maria was so nervous, she was shaking and her nerves were shot.

"Well, I guess this isn't so bad," she said, noting the slow speed they were currently traveling. But as soon as the words were out of her mouth, the ride delved into a new speed. A very fast pace as they descended a steep hill. The hill sent them underground for a split second, and darkness enclosed them, a loud wailing sound echoing in their ears. Maria's screams were practically breaking the sound barrier, as she squeezed John's hand for dear life. Well, it was either her screaming or Chris Masters. He was also letting his fear be known. The coaster spun through a very quick loop, followed by another. Shawn Michaels and Triple H had their hands up, enjoying the wind.

It seemed like a short-lived adrenaline rush, as the ride didn't last very long. This was the thought going through everyone's head as the ride came to a screeching halt. Well, except Chris Masters and Maria. Everyone got off, surveying Maria closely. She looked like she was about to cry.

"That was..." she began in a quivering voice.

"The most AWESOME thing ever!!!" She finished, jumping up and down, clapping her hands happily.

"What are we riding next?!" She asked enthusiastically.

**Group 2**

"Um, what are we supposed to do here?" Torrie Wilson asked her group, confused at the sight in front of her.

"We're supposed to 'maintain' the water rides," Kane replied, obviously not excited about the task before them.

"How exactly do we do that? Aren't they self operated?" Edge thought out loud.

"We're supposed to test ride them. Make sure they don't kill anyone," Ashley informed him.

"I'm not getting on anything that isn't safe. I'm too valuable for that," Lita spoke up, fluffing up her hair as if she were the queen of England.

"Valuable? Last I heard, you were a two-cent whore," Ashley commented. This caused Lita to push her into a nearby and seemingly very deep swimming pool.

"Ugh, bitch!" Ashley screamed, as soon as Kane had fished her out. As Ashley lunged at Lita, Kane held her back.

"Let me go! I'm gonna kill that slut!" Ashley shrieked.

"Stop! Let's just do this and go back to the hotel! If anyone around here is gonna start a fight, it's gonna be me," Kane shouted in a muffled voice, trying to calm everyone down.

"Keep away from my girl," Edge told Ashley with a warning tone.

"Oh, shut the hell up, you jackass. No one's scared of you," Kane said to Edge. Edge and Lita cowered away a few feet. The remainder of the crowd just stared on.

"So, which one first?" Chris Benoit asked, looking around their section of the park.

"That one looks fun!" Torrie exclaimed, pointing to a large water slide, which seemed to include innertubes. It looked quite tall and had gushing water shooting down it. The innertubes seemed exceptionally large, fit for four people. The group made their way over to it.

"Well, since I'm already wet," Ashley said in a significantly negative voice, the last part directed at Lita, who was the reason for her saturation. Ashley climbed in first. Kane got in beside her and Carlito and Torrie got on behind them.

"I don't wanna ride that thing! It looks dirty and-" Lita began, but she was cut off as she was pushed into the next innertube by the Undertaker.

"Hey!" Edge bellowed, but he was pushed on as well. Undertaker and Chris Benoit got on behind them. RVD pointed at himself three times with his thumbs, and pulled Randy Orton on the next one beside him. The three tubes took off quickly, shooting down three consecutive bumpy slopes coming to a smooth stop as a huge splash of water greeted the group. They were all in laughing fits, wiping themselves off and chattering excitedly.

"Dude!" Randy and RVD said simultaneously. Unknowingly, Ashley and Lita high-fived eachother. Everyone stared at them in shock.

"Um, that was completely unintentional!" Ashley said, crossing her arms. Lita nodded in agreement.

"That was pretty damn cool," Edge said. And what was also pretty damn cool and completely unintentional was the fact that the entire group was getting along after that.

**Group 3:**

Over at the hotel, things were not going as well for group 3. John Bradshaw Layfield was trying to get a rise out of Trish Stratus by insulting her wrestling moves.

"What the hell is Stratusfaction, anyway?" JBL asked the Canadian, blonde bombshell, receiving a cold stare in return.

"Something you'll never get in this lifetime," Jazz said, surprisingly in defense of her enemy on countless occasions.

"Bite me, Dennis Rodman," JBL told Jazz, but recieving a hard punch in the face from Trish.

"That felt so good," Trish breathed.

"Let's lock him outside!" The Hardys suggested. Indeed, most of the group members took turns kicking JBL in the ass until he was outside, eventually locking the door on him. With the exception of King Booker and Sharmell.

"So, what should we clean first?" Sabu asked.

"I can't believe they'd actually expect the King of the Wulled to pick up after any of you hooligans. I will not take part in this...SHAM!" King Booker said in dismay.

"All hail Ki-" Sharmell began, enthusiastically, but Ric Flair interrupted.

"Shut up! We heard you! The first seventeen billion times you said it! WOOO! I know they don't think the Nature Boy, WOO, the 16-time WWE Champion, the classiest guy in the business, the limozine riding, WOO, jet-flying, kiss stealing, wheelin' dealin' dirtiest player in the game-" Ric ranted, but he was cut off as well.

"ANYWAY, I think we should split up," Jeff Hardy said, trying to drown out the sounds of Ric Flair.

"Yeah. So, Booker-T and Sharmell-" Trish started.

"That's King Bookah, to _you_ wench!" Booker interjected.

"No you...did not...just call me...a wench," Trish said, trying to remain as calm as possible for about two seconds. After that, she unleashed hell on him, releasing a flurry of bitch slaps on his candy ass.

"Ah! My Queen! Helpeth me!" King Booker screamed in his odd, recently inherited foax British accent, which made him sound pretty damn girly.

"Yes, my King!" Sharmell replied, after which, spinning into a chain of 'All hail King Booker' chants. Luckily for her husband, Jeff and Matt pulled Trish off him.

"Fine. Sharmell and KING BOOKYEH, will take the first floor. That's where group 1 stays. Matt, Jeff and Trish will take the second floor. Jazz and Shelton will take the third, Ric and I will take the others. Keep an eye on her," Sabu instructed, whispering the last part to the Hardys, referring to Trish.

"Got it," Matt whispered back.

"I heard that!" Trish said to the group of men who were secretly talking about her. And so, the group began to clean. It took them a few hours to complete their chores, mostly because there were arguements, and everyone kept having to fish Sabu out of a dumpster, as he was jumping out of windows at a disturbing rate.

"I'm kinda hungry," Trish said when they finished. The group agreed with her and they all headed for the restaurant.

**Group 4:**

Group 4 did not expect cooking for 64 people to be as hard as it was. Bobby Lashley was struggling to make some dinner rolls, but he was simply throwing flour all over the place. Some of it landed in Johnny Nitro's deep fryer, as he and Joey Mercury were preparing fried chicken.

"Thanks dude, that piece was looking a bit underbreaded," Johnny Nitro told Lashley, not knowing it was an accident.

"No problem," Bobby said, through a face full of flour.

Meanwhile, Ron Simmons was trying to show Vito how to grill corn on the cob.

"Do you flip it over yet?" Vito asked his teacher, but ended up getting a bit closer then he'd intended. He was pressed against Ron for just a second, but it made Ron very uncomfortable.

"Damn!" Ron Simmons said.

CM Punk and Kelly Kelly were cutting up potatoes to mash, but Kelly Kelly was a bit too preoccupied. She was talking Punk's ears off.

"But then Jennifer told Shawn that Craig and Mandy hadn't broken up yet, so he got really mad because he really liked Mandy. But then, somehow, Jake got in the picture and started to like Jennifer, or so Jen thought. She is actually just really self-absorbed and thinks everyone wants to date her. Oh my gosh! Don't tell her I said that!" Kelly said to CM Punk, ending her rant in an extremely serious voice.

"I don't know any of those people," CM Punk replied, after a quick gasp. Kelly was so busy talking, he had no idea how she had not cut her finger off yet. Watching her cut potatoes without paying attention was like watching the end of an Undertaker-Mankind Hell in a Cell match. You had no clue how it was going to end, but you were sure something bad was gonna happen.

Kristal was trying to cut onions to put in the greenbeans Supercrazy was cooking, but was crying the entire time. She couldn't stand the fumes, as they made her eyes water. Snitsky though she was crying for something else.

"What's the matter? Need a foot massage?" He asked hopefully.

"Ew, get away from me you freak!" She replied, disgusted.

**All Groups:**

All of the wrestlers had shown up at the restaurant, ready to eat dinner. They were all seated at their selected tables. It was similar to a mess hall. Table 1 saw The Hardys, Trish, Undertaker, Kane, John Cena, Maria, Ashley, Edge, Lita, DX, Chris Benoit and Layla. Table 2 seated Finlay, Hornswoggle, Big Show, Carlito, Torrie Wilson, King Booker, Sharmell, Ric Flair, Sabu and Michelle McCool. Chris Masters, Randy Orton, Gregory Helms, Rey Mysterio, RVD, JBL, Jazz, Mr. Kennedy, Candice Michelle, Miz, Balls Mahoney and Victoria were at table 3. At table 4 was Shelton Benjamin, Umaga, Estrada, Khali, MVP, William Regal, Jillian Hall, Kenny Dykstra, Mickie James, Batista, Melina, Test, Hardcore Holly, Mark Henry and Sandman. Table 5 was occupied by Kevin Thorn, Ariel, Viscera, and was also reserved for group 4.

"Where da food at?" Asked Viscera, hungrily.

"Calm down there, big boy," Candice Michelle said to him. Finally, as if on cue, group 4 arrived, carrying large trays of food. They all seemed to be having trouble.

"Oh, let me help," Maria said happily, willing getting out of her seat to help Kelly Kelly carry her tray.

"Come on, lets go help," Rey Mysterio told his table. Soon, all the other tables followed in tow to help group 4 carry everything.

"I can't believe we just worked together on something," Trish Stratus told everyone, once the food had been set down.

"Yeah, I think it's a miracle," Lita replied.

"Okay, this is what I mean. If we can work together once, we can do it again! But, only next time, we could come up with a plan to get Vince back for what he's doing to us," CM Punk said, whispering the last part as he remembered there were hidden cameras.

"He's got a point," Carlito agreed.

"It'd have to be absolutely brilliant to fool Vince though. Even though he may look retarded, he can figure things out pretty quick," Triple H said.

"Before we decide anything, we need to just think on it for a few days. Let it sink in just what Vince is doing to us. How miserable he's making us, enabling us to come up with the sickest, most twisted, most devious plan we possibly can," Kane said, joining in the fun.

"I think we'd need to wait a while, though. We're stuck here for three and a half months," John Cena piped up.

"Well, if we come up with a good enough plan, we might just get out of here sooner," CM Punk added.

"So, how has everyone else's day been going?" Maria asked politely. A spur of annoyed groans echoed around the 'restaurant'. Most people murmered things like 'horrible' or 'this sucks'.

"Groups 5 and 6, have you guys even started working yet?" Ashley asked.

"Yeah, we've done a bit. We're not done yet though," Batista said, through a mouthfull of food. Johnny Nitro had just shoved himself in between him Batista and Melina.

"Yeah, same here," Mickie James said, in an oddly calm voice.

"Hey, baby," Johnny said to Melina, who didn't look equally as happy to see him.

"Johnny," Melina said, in a voice that signaled she was about to crack.

"Something wrong? You need a massage?" Johnny said, grabbing for her shoulders.

"STOP IT! Okay? Just stop it! You are smothering me! I can't get a break from you! You won't leave me alone at any time! The only peace I've had all day was while you were in the kitchen! I swear! Checking up on me every five minutes while I was working! Just go away for once! Better yet, I'll leave! I'm going back to the hotel. Just give me some breathing room, God!" Melina burst out, screaming in an enraged fit. The entire room, but especially Johnny was looking like her as if she'd gone completely insane. They were all gaping at her. And maybe she had gone a little overboard.

"Look, I'm sorry for snapping at you. I just think we need some time apart," Melina added, a bit calmer this time. Johnny was simply floored, as Melina jogged from the scene without another word.

"But anyway, I think this plan thing could really work," CM Punk spoke, bouncing back. As everyone (with the exception of Johnny) soon forgot about what had just happened with Melina, Batista continued to stare out the door she had just exited. Maybe he would talk to her about it later.

Soon, the meal was finished, as was the good time.

"That was, hmm. Fun..." Lita said, surprised.

"Seriously. I think this living together thing could work out," Kelly Kelly said in a singsong voice.

"Look, don't get ahead of yourself, sweetie. It'll be a very long time before that's ever okay," Lita shot back.

"Can you not go two seconds without starting an argument?" John Cena asked the redhead.

"Um, excuse me Cena. I seem to remember this being a free country," Lita responded, hands on her hips.

"Oh, good. That means I'm perfectly free to stick my foot up your ass," Ashley said, also jumping on Lita.

"Everybody shut up. Gather up your groups and get back to work. Don't make me get ugly," Kane piped up, over everyone else.

"Too late," Gregory Helms muttered. Kane suddenly scowled.

"Did you say something?" Kane asked Gregory in a demanding voice.

"No, Mr. Kane, sir," Gregory responded, standing up straight and shaking as though scared.

"Yeah, I didn't think so," Kane replied.

**Group 5:**

This group soon had to return working, as they had not finished. They were still buzzing from dinner (hehe, no not that kind of buzz) and some of them were ready to fight. Okay, maybe it was mostly Umaga, but still. Batista looked around and realized Melina still had not returned from the hotel, yet. He decided to ditch the group and go check up on her. It was just in time, too. Umaga was starting to get a bit too antsy with Candice Michelle.

"Back off, Shriveled Up Monkey Penis," Mr. Kennedy told Umaga, who was standing really close to Candice, sniffing her...ear.

"Hab id doo baba!!!! Apay unot," Umaga replied, in a language that was unknown to normal people.

"What the hell did you just say, man?" Kevin Thorn asked the Samoan Bulldozer. Okay...maybe it was unknown to weird people also. Meanwhile, Batista found Melina crying next to a dumpster in an alleyway between two buildings he'd never seen before.

"Hey, Nitro's girl. You okay?" Batista asked the sniffling Diva.

"Don't call me that! And, what do you care anyway?" She shot back at him.

"Fair enough. At least tell me what's bugging you," the Animal said, staring at her with sincere eyes.

"Why should I?" Melina replied softly, placing a palm against her forehead.

"Oh, come on. Don't make me sing one of those gay songs about friendship," Batista pleaded, touching her shoulder in an awkward motion. The comment made Melina omit a slight giggle.

"It's just...I can't stand Johnny, anymore. He's suffocationg and way annoying," Melina said, sounding a bit guilty about her resentment.

"Then, don't be with him anymore," Batista offered, recieving a skeptical look.

"It's not that simple. He obviously feels very deeply for me," Melina stated solemnly.

"Heh, yeah right. He cares very deeply for your body," Batista replied, knowingly. Melina glared at him for a second, making him rethink his chosen words. But deep down, she knew he was right.

"I guess we should get back to work," Melina suggested, getting up and dusting off the back of her faded blue jeans.

"Yeah," Batista said, getting a bit of a headstart heading back.

"And, Batista?" Melina called out. He turned around.

"Thank you," she said softly. He gave a small smile and nod and kept walking. Maybe bunking with her wasn't going to be as bad as he thought.

**Group 6:**

"Eww, I have dirt all over my beautiful face!" Jillian Hall squealed, holding one of those sticks with a sharp end to pick up litter.

"That's a contradicting statement," William Regal told the blonde.

"How so? I do have dirt all over my face!" Jillian responded.

"Yes. But you don't have a beautiful face," he replied, chuckling.

"Ugh! Shut up, foreigner," Jillian screamed back at him.

"I wonder where the Great Khali went," Mickie James said to Kenny Dykstra, who she'd been sticking pretty close to.

"I don't know. I'm not sure if I really want to," Kenny replied, stopping his work to talk to the hyper Diva.

"I wonder how he rides the subway standing up," Mickie pondered. Kenny chuckled softly at her. Sure, she could be annoying, but to him, she was pretty damn cute.

"Oh my gosh! What is that?!" Victoria yelped, pointing up at the sky. A shiny black dot could be seen overhead.

"OH NO! OH MY GOD! The aliens are coming for us! Whatever will we do?! We have to run and hide, or they will give us all anal probes!" MVP shouted randomly, recieving many odd looks from his colleagues.

"It's Vince's private jet! I think he's landing somewhere in the park!" Test said, confused.

"What's he doing here?!" Layla asked, in her heavy Brittish accent.

"Hard to say. But something tells me we won't like it too much," Kenny Dykstra said, as worried as everyone else.

**A/N:** Oh geez. What's Vince doing there? What could possibly happen next? Will the Superstars ever devise a plan? Will I stop asking retarded questions and get to the next chapter? No. Just kidding. I shall start now, faithful followers! Love you guys! Ciao!


	5. Shaking Things Up

**Sticking Together In Vinnieland**

**Chapter 5 - Switching Things Up**

**A/N:** WOW, what a cliffhanger on that last chapter. Even I was surprised, so I just had to start on this chapter to find out what happened!!!

**Disclaimer:** I obviously don't own the WWE, or else this all would be happening in real life. Then, ALL MY DREAMS WOULD COME TRUE xD

**Chapter Summary:** When Vince makes a surprise visit to his miserable employees, how will he change things? And will it make them even angrier?

!#$&()+

"You may be wondering why I'm here," Vince stated, straightening his tie.

"Um, duh stupid," Ashley piped up, adding a yawn. All the Superstars were tired from working all day, and they were less than pleased that Vince had decided to pop in on them unexpectedly just when they were all about to go to bed.

"Well, I'm glad you are all enjoying your stay here. Not. I was expecting you to be a bit more miserable and cranky. Me and all my billionaire friends were sitting around watching you guys and let me tell you. It was brutally boring. Since you all embarrassed me in front of my friends, you will all now pay dearly. I've come up with a solution to shake things up a bit," Vince said excitedly.

"Oh great! What now?" Mr. Kennedy asked God.

"Good question. One which I will answer right now. You see, I think the rooms I placed some of you in were a mistake, therefore I will be changing them. Rest assured, I won't be changing all of them. Some of them I like, but not all of them," Vince explained.

"The groups are fine," Trish said, concerned about what group of weirdos she'd be placed with next.

"Glad you spoke up, Ms. Stratus. You'll be changing your roommate, as well. I'll start with you, actually. You will be switching from JBL to noth of the Hardys," Vince said with a smile. Trish suddenly changed her tune, realizing she wouldn't have to see JBL anymore. She felt an arm shoot around her shoulders.

"Hey hey, roomie," said the charismatic Jeff Hardy who was sitting beside her. Trish flashed him a smile. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad after all.

"What about me?" Ashley said, fearfully. To be honest, Kane was a pretty cool guy, and she'd hate to lose him as a roommate.

"Hmm, Massaro..." Vince trailed off, reading the names from a clip board he was holding.

"You'll be sticking with Kane. That pair is endlessly entertaining, but we will be adding Hornswoggle in with you guys," Vince said with a chuckle. Ashley breathed a sigh of relief as she was not going to lose Kane, which Kane caught her doing, so he narrowed his eyes at her. However, she wondered what living with Hornswoggle would be like.

"I'm not switching am I?!" Mr. Kennedy and Kenny Dykstra asked, for fear of losing their lovely female companions.

"Nope, you two will be keeping your roommates. So, you can never say I'm not charitable," Vince said with a smirk. The two men looked extremely relieved.

"Umm, John Cena will be recieving a new roommate in the form of the lovely Torrie Wilson," Vince read from his list. Torrie Wilson raised her eyebrows toward the Champ, and Carlito looked infuriated.

"What? That is **not** cool! You can not make me give up Torrie. She is the only scenary in that stupid hotel room you gave me!" Carlito ranted, adding something in Spanish that would make Ron Simmons blush. Torrie looked shocked at his outburst.

"But you will be gaining Maria and Layla," Vince added, ignoring Carlito's ramblings. Carlito suddenly looked fine with the chairman's decision.

"Okay then. Now, that...**that's** cool," Carlito said, chewing on an apple.

"Um, excuse me?!" Torrie shouted. After all, even if she was rooming with John, she was still dating Carlito.

"Torrie, Torrie, Torrie. We've had some good times. But I'm moving on to bigger and better things, now," Carlito said. This made Torrie tear up, but she hid it.

"If we're done with the Young and the Restless, due to those changing rooms, Rey Mysterio will now be bunking with the Big Show. Anyway, Batista and Melina will be staying as is, but Nitro and Triple H will be exchanging roommates," Vince said, nonregretfully. Triple H looked glum at the fact that he would be losing his friend Shawn Michaels and being forced to room with Joey Mercury.

"You keep your gayness away from me," Hunter told Joey. Joey, in turn, flipped him off.

"Edge and the Undertaker will also be exchanging roommates. That means Lita's now in Undertaker's room and Chris Benoit is bunking with Edge," Vince said, before being deafened by an earth-shattering scream from Lita.

"I am not sleeping in the same room as the Undertaker!" Lita squealed, looking disgusted.

"What? I'm perfectly normal. Fun at parties. What is wrong with me?" Undertaker said, with his eyes rolled back in his head.

"Good luck with that," Edge told the fiery redhead, recieving a look of disdain in return.

"Let's see. Finlay will, from this moment, be bunking with JBL, and MVP, you'll now be with Michelle McCool," Vince read from his list. MVP started bouncing up and down in his chair.

"RVD and Randy Orton will still be together," Vince said.

"Hey, it's not like we're gay or something," Randy shuddered, looking grossed out.

"It's okay Randy. We don't have to hide our love anymore," came Rob's sarcastic reply.

"Ever since Evolution, I knew he was gay," Ric Flair said with a chuckle. Randy looked displeased, being the butt of the current gay joke. Wow, that was an interesting choice of words.

"And, because I like to hear King Booker's conversations with Queen Sharmell in their fake Brittish accents, they'll continue to stay in the same room. As for Shelton and Jazz, they will be splitting up as roommates. Jazz will now be staying with JBL and Shelton will be bunking with Bobby and Kristal," Vince continued. Bobby didn't look exactly happy with this news, as he would now have to share Kristal as a roommate.

"Test will now be with Hardcore Holly, since their former roommates are paired with someone else. Jillian, since Layla has a different roommate, you will be added in with Chris Masters and Gregory Helms," Vince informed her. Jillian looked neutral about the situation.

"Well, at least they actually have class and integrity," Jillian shot nastily to Layla. But when she actually spotted her roommates, they were still hitting each other in the head with Finlay's shellileigh.

"The rest of you will be staying put," Vince instructed. They all groaned and looked angry.

"You came all the way here just to change a few rooms? That was retarded!" Bobby Lashley spoke up and said.

"Maybe, but it doesn't matter. I can do whatever the hell I want, and you can't do a damn thing to stop me," Vince said, adding evil laughter for dramatic effect.

"We'll see about that," CM Punk said to himself.

And as the chairman left all of his Superstars to wallow in their own misery and self pity, CM Punk decided to lay an idea out on the table.

"Guys, we've got to do something," he persuaded.

"You're right! We can't just let him toy with us like that. We need to come up with a plan to crush him," Ashley said, a twisted expression on her face.

"You have a dark side. I like it," Kane told the self proclaimed 'Dirty Diva'. She blushed.

"Okay, let's come up with something tomorrow, though. I'm beat," Triple H said.

"Wait a second. Maybe not everyone wants to take part in your stupid little schemes," JBL said, pushing past everyone to get to CM Punk.

"Oh, so you are in favor of wasting away here for three and a half months just to make Vince giggle?" CM Punk countered, crossing his arms. JBL thought for a second.

"So, what'd you have in mind?" JBL replied, changing his mind.

"Well, we'd have to take out all of the hidden cameras around here, so we could set everything up," CM Punk suggested, thinking.

"How would we find them all? Plus, there's the issue of taking them out without Vince knowing it was us that did it," Trish said, in a thinking stance.

"Well, sweetheart. Why didn't you say something before?!" Hornswoggle said to Trish. Everyone looked at him like he'd just turned purple and sprouted 6 more legs.

"I happen to have a supreme love for electronics. I have just the thing you're looking for. You see, Vince's cameras are all run by a computer network," he continued. Everyone was still staring at him funny.

"What you talkin' about, midget?" The Undertaker interfered harshly. Hornswoggle obviously took offense to that, and didn't answer him.

"How do you know that?" Layla asked the little green dude.

"I've seen some of them. I brought my laptop with me and I just happen to know how to send people viruses," Hornswoggle said, confidently.

"I think I know where you're going with this. You could send a virus to the network that's running Vince's cameras and cause them all to shut down!" Shawn Michaels stated, excitedly.

"Well, not exactly. The network running Vince's cameras isn't a network you can send messages to. I'd have to crack the code, get into the network and plant the virus there," Hornswoggle said, concerned.

"Can you do that?" John Cena asked him.

"Can genies grant wishes?!" Hornswoggle replied, with a wide grin.

"You're silly! Everybody knows genies only exist in France! Triple H told me that!" Maria piped up, in a hyper voice. Everyone just sort of stared at her with blank expressions.

"No, Maria. I told you _fairies_ only existed in France," Triple H said, adding a chuckle.

"Well, let's think about it some more tomorrow," Kelly Kelly advised them, as they were all exhausted from their day.

As the WWE Champ and his new roommate, Torrie Wilson were walking back to their room, John noticed Torrie was very quiet.

"Still upset about Carlito?" He asked her. She glared at him as if he were stupid.

"That's a dumb question," she replied in a harsh tone. He grabbed her arm and turned her around to face him.

"Just forget about that bastard. If he treats you like that, he doesn't deserve someone as beautiful," John said. Instantly, Torrie was kissing him wildly, much to his surprise and enjoyment, but he pushed her back momentarily.

"What the hell are you doing?" John asked, bewildered.

"If you treat me like that, then you deserve me," she said with a smile. John seemed satisfied with her answer and pulled her deftly into the confines of their room.

Meanwhile, Triple H was trying to debunk the odd noises coming from the room next door. He speculated many possibilities, but finally decided to go see for himself. Joey had already fallen asleep, and Triple H crept out of the room quietly so he wouldn't wake up. Not because he was worried about Joey's sleep, but because if he woke up, Triple H didn't want to hear him rant.

When he finally stood in front of room number 1, he swung the door open, and gasped at what he saw.

"OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHH! EVERYBODY WAKE UP!!!!!! TORRIE AND JOHN ARE TOTALLY DOING IT!!!! I SWEAR, THEY LOOK LIKE TWO JACK RABBITS DOING THE HIPPITY DIPPITY!!! I REALLY MEAN IT THIS TIME! IT'S NOT LIKE WHEN I SAID I SAW BIGFOOT!!!!!!" Triple H screamed, running through the halls. No one seemed to care about it though, as no one came to witness it.

"You guys all suck!" Triple H said, skidding to halt outside of room 1, only to have the door slammed in his face. He decided to give up, and go back to his own room, defeated.

"You guys do realize Vince is watching you, right?!" He yelled to the next room, and suddenly the noises stopped. He shrugged and rolled over to go to sleep.

**A/N:** HA, I thought that last part would be funny. And someone requested that John and Torrie be a pairing in this fic, so you can officially add them to the pairings list for this story. Hopefully this fic will be super long. If so, by the end, everyone will probably be with someone completely different then you first assumed. Love you all! Ciao!


	6. The Love Connection

**Sticking Together In Vinnielan**

**Chapter 6 - A Love Connection**

**A/N:** This is the funny chapter where some peoples hook up. No, not quite like John and Torrie did last chapter, but they get their flirt on, nonetheless. And, someone requested that John and Torrie get together. I may have put them together, but that doesn't mean I'm not gonna poke fun at them! xD It also doesn't mean they're gonna be together throughout the entire fic. Maria's gonna fit into their romance too, because she likes John as well. xD But anyway, this whole fic will be a big tangled web of romance.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own the WWE. Like I said...if I _did_ own it, the wrestlers really would be forced to live in an amusement park for 3 and a half months. xD

**Chapter Summary:** While everyone's trying to think of a plan...some wrestlers find a good way to pass time. And it's not by working...

!#$&()+

All of the WWE Superstars and Divas had given up coming up with a plan for the moment. Most of them just decided that they would need a lot of time to devise something vicious enough to fool even Vince McMahon. Like Triple H said, he may look retarded, but he's not retarded all of the time. Anyway, they just did their chores without complaints, causing fake fights with each other sometimes, to entertain Vince. They wanted to make him think they were following his orders for now.

But good old group one was just hanging out by the rides in that section of the park. Torrie had snuck over from her work group to see John and to do...other things. Everyone was pretty grossed out by them, but were happy for them. Except for Maria, that is. Luckily, they skipped away somewhere else to be all lovey dovey.

"Ew. They're nasty," Maria said. Everyone assumed it was because she was jealous of Torrie, and she never accepted the accusations, but she never denied them, either.

"I agree. Glad they went somewhere else," Chris Masters laughed.

"Yeah, but they're still nasty," Maria replied, glumly. The sadness in her voice made everyone feel sorry for her.

"Just forget about it, sweetheart. I'm sure you'll find someone else. It'd be hard not to with as pretty as you are," Chris Masters replied, in a surprisingly un-jerklike tone. This made Maria blush furiously.

"Really?!" She said excitedly.

"Of course. Why don't we ditch working for a little while and go get something to eat?" Chris suggested. Maria nodded shyly, and took his hand to follow. Triple H watched them go in surprise.

"Bow chicka wowt wowt," he sang, doing crotch chops. Shawn found this incredibly disturbing. As did everyone else in the group, but they said nothing.

**Meanwhile**

"Hey, where's Torrie?" Carlito asked his group for the upteenth time.

"Ugh...for the upteenth time (SEE?), she went looking for Cena," Ashley said, annoyed.

"Why?" He asked, as if he had no idea.

"Because they're going out," Lita said, as if Carlito were dumb.

"Why?" He repeated.

"Because you dumped her for Maria and Layla, dumbass! By the way, I saw Maria giggle through here a while back with Masters," Ashley said, leaning aginst a ride control panel. Evidently, she leaned over too far and fell off the side of the platform they were all standing on.

"Everybody stay here. I'm gonna go rescue Ms. Co-ordination over there. Again..." Kane said, irritated that he always had to save her.

"Hey, Ash, I'll be right down to get you," the Big Red Machine called out to his fallen comrade. He recieved no response.

"Ashley?" He called again. Still nothing.

"Oh my gosh! What if she's really hurt?!" Lita squealed, recieving odd looks from her group.

"Not that I care," she added, quickly. Kane rolled his eyes.

"Ashley? Are you okay?" Kane called out again. She still wasn't making any noise. No one had ever seen Kane move as fast as he did climbing down that platform into the tiny grassy area underneath. He saw no sign of her.

"Do you see her?" Undertaker asked, peering down there, along with everyone else.

"No! Where the hell did she go?!" He said loudly. As soon as the words were out of his mouth, someone grabbed him from behind in a fit of laughter. It made Kane yell because he thought someone was attacking him.

"Ashley! What the hell?!" Kane yelled out, obviously startled by the attack from the chuckling Diva.

"That's what you get for calling me Ms. Co-ordination. I told you to stop that. Wow, you seemed pretty concerned for my well-being when you rushed down here," Ashley said, suspiciously.

"Well, I figured Vince wouldn't be too happy if you died," Kane replied, out of breath from the commotion.

"Right," Ashley said, not believing him. They heard everyone above them breathe sighs of relief.

"But, I did hurt my ankle," Ashley informed him, wincing as she looked down.

"Guess you'd better get back to the hotel, then," Kane said, obviously overjoyed that he'd be free from saving her anymore. At least that day.

"How? I can barely stand up," Ashley retorted, sarcastically.

"Hm," Kane mumbled, thinking for a moment. Then, without warning, he lifted her headfirst over his shoulder and began carrying her back. Everyone found this comical, which they expressed in their laughter.

"Alright, then," Ashley said in a muffled voice.

"Well, that was interesting. Kinda like that thing Undertaker showed me last night," Lita giggled. Edge looked alarmed.

"What did he show you?" He asked.

"He said I couldn't tell anyone," she replied, glancing at her fingernails.

"No, little one. I said don't tell anyone important. You can tell this loser," Undertaker told Lita, pointing at Edge. Lita obviously found this funny, at least until Edge glared at her.

**Meanwhile**

"Woo!" Ric Flair yelled.

"Shut up, damn it," JBL told the Nature Boy.

"Both of you shut up," Shelton Benjamin told them.

"All three of you shut the hell up!" Jazz said, in a manlier and altogether more intimidating voice, causing the three men to shut up at once.

"You know, you're kind of sexy when you yell," Shelton replied, close to Jazz's ear, but she slapped him away.

"Oh please. You can't handle none of this," Jazz replied, looking quite arrogant.

"We'll see about it," Shelton said, striding back to his own spot.

"I think I'm gonna throw up," Trish said to herself, watching the scene unfold.

"I'm with you," Jeff said from beside her. Trish laughed.

"So, how's your boyfriend doing?" Jeff asked, kind of awkwardly.

"I don't have a boyfriend," Trish said, looking confused.

"Oh, really?" Jeff perked up, standing at attention.

"Yeah. You knew that, already. But why do you ask?" Trish asked, slyly. Jeff looked lost for words and quite embarrassed.

"Well, it was just...nothing," he said, almost sadly. Trish felt bad for him. But he was so cute when he was confused or hiding something.

"No. I assume you asked for a reason," she continued to prod, following him as he began to walk away.

"No, not really," Jeff said, continuing his charade.

"Come on. You can tell me anything," Trish told the nervous daredevil, sincerely.

"No I can't," Jeff said, spinning around to face her. Trish looked disappointed.

"Well..." she began, inching closer to him. She planted a soft kiss on his cheek.

"If you ever _do_ wanna tell me, I'll be around," she said, flashing him a smile before walking off to the restaurant. Jeff stood glued to the spot, not moving. Matt grinned at the scene, then waved a hand in front of his distant brother.

"Anyone in there?" He asked, continuing to wave his hand. He recieved no response. Jeff just stood there with his mouth partially opened and wide eyes.

"Hmm, guess not," Matt said, shrugging and leaving his gaping brother alone.

"My King, I have news for thee," Sharmell told King Booker in a poetic fashion.

"Yes, my Queen," he replied, in his creepy fake accent.

"I am with child," she replied hesitantly. If you could've seen the look on King Booker's face, you would've probably died laughing. His eyes were like saucers, and he stuttered for a moment.

"Baby! Say something!" Sharmell said, going back to her Texas roots for a moment.

"Tell me you didn't just say that!!! You pregnant!? It's mine right?! Aw hell no!" Booker freaked out, switching over to a southern accent as well.

"Of course it's yours, dumbass! I know you didn't just accuse me of steppin' out?!" Sharmell shot back, exasperated. She began waving her arms violently and making all sorts of rude hand gestures toward the King, before walking off in a huff.

"Wait, baby! I ain't mean it like that!" Booker said desperately, following her.

"Wow, I actually feel sorry for KING BOOKYEH," Sabu said, adding a laugh.

"Really? I don't!" Ric Flair added.

**Meanwhile**

Group 4 was simply hanging out in the kitchen of the restaurant. All the Superstars had begun to come at different times, so they didn't have to cook as much at once. Right now, they were all bored because everyone who was in the restaurant had already eaten and were simply trying to get away from working.

Kristal Marshall had headphones on and was dancing and singing wildly while she was preparing herself a snack. Bobby Lashley watched her intently. She would catch him watching her every so often, and it made her blush.

"Stop looking at me," she scolded him.

"I'm not," he said innocently.

"Yes you are!" She replied, spreading peanut butter on a slice of bread.

"I am Super-" Supercrazy began, running through the kitchen in a random moment, shouting.

"WE KNOW!" The entire group yelled at him. He walked out sadly.

"Oh my gosh, did you hear about Sarah? She totally fell into a swimming pool when she was walking because she was staring at this total hottie. But he laughed at her! He didn't even help her out or anything," Kelly Kelly explained to CM Punk. He looked...surprisingly intrigued in her story.

"Oh my gosh! What a jerk. So what about Samantha and Kevin? Are they still going out, or did Alexis break them up yet?" He responded, shoving popcorn in his mouth.

"No, I think she changed her mind. I think she likes Brad now! But now Sierra likes Kevin who's best friends with Adam who likes Sierra! But girly doesn't know that! She thinks it's Kevin who likes her, but it's actually Adam!" Kelly replied, excited to divulge the information.

"Oh my gosh!" CM Punk shrieked. After a moment, CM Punk smiled up at Kelly.

"I'm really glad I got to know you, Kel," he told her. His heart melted when she flashed him an innocent smile.

"Why don't you put on some pink nail polish, too? And Triple H thinks I'm gay..." Joey Mercury said, whispering the last part to Johnny Nitro.

"So does everyone else," Johnny said to himself.

"Hey, no touching," Kristal told Bobby, who'd accidentally brushed her shoulder in his pursuit for a hot dog.

"I didn't mean to. You sure are full of yourself," Bobby Lashley commented, annoyed at her assumption that everyone wanted her. Kristal became teary-eyed at his comment, and sped off in the direction of the hotel, crying.

"Kristal, wait!" He yelled after her, feeling remorseful.

"Hey, Ron. Do you like my dress, today?" Vito asked the tough beer consumer. Ron rolled his eyes, but said nothing.

"Or maybe I should go a brighter shade of pink?" Vito said, admiring himself in a stainless steel cubboard.

"Damn," Ron said, sorry that he was stuck in the same room as Vito, the girly man. Meanwhile, Snitsky was sucking on his own toes in the corner.

**Meanwhile**

"Haha, no you're funnier," Melina, the sometimes devilish Diva told the Animal, Batista.

"No, you are," he replied, becoming a bit closer to her.

"No, you both are annoying," Mr. Kennedy said, rolling his eyes. Dave and Melina had been at the mushy stuff all day long.

"Aww, Kenny boo-boo angwy?" Candice said, in a baby-like voice. Everyone started cracking up.

"Candy! I told you not to call me that in front of the guys," he said, humiliated.

"Kenny boo-boo? What the hell?" Balls Mahoney laughed.

"Speaking of, hey Ariel..." Miz said.

"Miz, I'm not trying any of your What The Hell Stew!" Ariel shouted, before he could offer.

"You suck," Miz said, crossing his arms and looking disgruntled.

"That's right, so you'd better watch it," Ariel said, flicking her tongue at him. He backed away in fear.

"Hm, yeah so...I was wondering if you'd like to head up on the Farris Wheel tonight after dark. It's really cool when everything lights up," Batista offered to Melina. She looked excited about it.

"I'd love to," she said, in a giggly voice.

"What are you, in junior high?" Kennedy said again.

"Be nice, Kenny boo-boo, or I'll have to get the whip," Candice threatened him. He looked alarmed, and shut his mouth.

**Meanwhile**

"It's alright, Montel. I don't think you look like a Power Ranger," Layla El told the once again crying MVP, who was seated on the ground rocking back and forth.

"Really?" He asked, hopefully.

"Yes. You're quite handsome, actually," Layla giggled.

"Oh please...he's acting like a girl!" Victoria spoke up, crossing her arms in a defensive stance.

"Seriously," Test said, shaking his head. He then threw a sideways glance to Victoria.

"What are you looking at?" She snapped at him, getting in his face.

"A tough broad," Test replied, showing no sign of intimidation.

"And yet you aren't backing down. Hm, not bad," Victoria said with a smirk.

"You know it, babe," Test said, arrogantly.

"Ha, don't get too ahead of yourself," Victoria responded, tolling her eyes.

"Haha, did you hear what Candice called Ken?" Mickie James asked Kenny Dykstra, bursting out laughing.

"Eh, don't remind me. She just had to use my name!" Kenny said, looking weary.

"Aw, it's okay. At least we get to torture him," Mickie replied, calmly.

"You sure have toned it down since we moved in here," Kenny said, noting her attitude change.

"I guess you're right. I guess it's time to grow up," Mickie said maturely.

"Nah. I prefer you hyper. I think it's cute," Kenny said, trailing off on the last bit, strolling away from the shocked Diva.

"Why is everyone forming romantic relations?" William Regal asked Jillian Hall. She shrugged and then burst into tears.

"Nobody wants me! I guess my beautiful singing intimidates them," she said dramatically. William hugged her.

"You know, I was born naughty," he told the hysterical Diva. She gave him a desperate look.

"So, Michelle. You enjoying bunking with MVP?" Hardcore Holly asked his former roommate.

"Psh, no. He never stops crying about the fans chanting Power Ranger at him. He's worse than you!" She yelled at him, obviously on edge.

"You seem stressed. Wanna do it behind that old abandoned car?" He said straightforwardly. She looked disgusted at first, but thought about what he said.

"What is an abandoned car doing in an amusement park?!" She said, confused. Suddenly, they heard an aguished cry come from it.

**A/N:** OOOH cliffhanger!!!! Hehe hope that was good. It's really just a filler chapter until the next one!!! Hmmmm, wonder who made that sound xD Love you all!!!! Ciao!


	7. New Prisoners

**Sticking Together In Vinnieland**

**Chapter 7 - New Prisoners**

**A/N:** LOL oh snaps. What could happen now?! HAHA thanks to all who reviewed! Including the anon. ones! xD

**Disclaimer:** Yes, I own the WWE. Also, there will be 8 more Harry Potter books. \ NOT

**Chapter Summary:** Who was in the abandoned car? And how will they fit into the Superstars' scheme?

!#$&()+

Pretty much every Superstar inhabitant of the amusement park had shown up in group 6's work space. Ever since Michelle had heard someone cry out from the abandoned car she'd spotted, it seemed to be the hot topic of the day. Even Kane had carried Ashley back there from the hotel. He'd had her draped over his shoulder for hours, and it was a bit uncomfortable for her.

"My ankle stopped hurting like two hours ago. You can let me down, now," Ashley told the Big Red Machine.

"It's probably vulnerable to injury right now. You might hurt it again," he replied. She rolled her eyes, but smiled through the pain in her mid section. She hopped down from his shoulder, much to his chagrin.

"Guys! There's someone in that car! What should we do?!" Michelle McCool announced to the group, frantically. The car hadn't been there before. This was the first time they'd even seen it.

"We should go set them on fire," Undertaker suggested, pulling a matchbook out of his overcoat pocket.

"No! They might sue us or something," William Regal said smartly.

"They might be hurt! We should go help them!" Maria said. Everyone was gaping at her, as she'd said something that wasn't stupid.

"Yeah. They might also be criminals or murderers or someone Vince sent us to make us even more miserable," Edge stated. Everyone agreed with his comment, but Triple H made his way to the car, no less. The car was a little banged up, and very dusty.

"Hunter. What are you doing?!" Shawn whispered frantically.

"Why are you whispering?" Triple H whispered back.

"I don't know," Shawn replied in a normal voice. Triple H surveyed the car carefully. The windows were tinted, so he couldn't see inside. Everyone held their breath, as Triple H slowly opened the car door. It was like everything was moving in slow motion. Triple H kept opening the door. Still opening the door. Damn it, he's just going really slow. When _finally_ the door was opened, out popped the MOST TERRIBLE THING YOU COULD IMAGINE.

Two Canadians and a Virginia native. That's right. I said two Canadians and a Virginia native. Wondering who? It was none other than Chris Jericho, Christian and Maven.

"What the FUCK?!" Triple yelped, obviously not expecting to see the three men.

"Hey, Runter. How's it showing man?!" Chris Jericho said, as if he were heavily intoxicated. With that, he fainted and hit the ground with a loud thump.

"What the hell's wrong with him?" Kenny Dykstra asked, stepping forward from the large crowd.

"Long story," Maven said, panting from the heat.

It turns out the three men had been in the car for hours, with no air conditioning or food. All the Superstars had taken them to the restaurant to eat.

"Why didn't you just get out of the car?" Shawn Michaels asked them.

"It locks from the outside. Vince told us he'd bought it for us for our wonderful years of service to the WWE. When we got in it, he locked the doors and towed the car here," Christian explained.

"Why is it so banged up?" CM Punk asked, confused.

"Vince decided he'd have a bit of fun and ram us into things," Maven told him, taking a bite of a dinner roll.

"What happened to Chris? Is he drunk, or something?" Ashley asked, a bit amused with Chris' actions earlier.

"Quite. You see, we may have been without food or air conditioning, but for some reason, there was plenty of booze in the car. Chris had himself a party for one," Christian said, chuckling.

"I bet you're pretty pissed at Vince," Triple H said, developing a sly smirk.

"Pretty pissed doesn't begin to cover it. The next time I see his rich ass, I'm going to kick it into the Amazon river," Chris Jericho yelled, with slurred words.

"We've got a better idea," Trish said, grinning.

"Yeah. What blondie said. Turns out Finlay's little green midget can shut the hidden cameras down. That's all there is to the plan for now, though," Undertaker explained.

"We prefer 'little people'," Hornswoggle said, annoyed.

"Oh. Right. Sorry, midget," Undertaker replied.

"Well, here's a little addition to your plan. When the cameras shut off, Vince is gonna wonder what the hell is going on. So he'll probably come down here. That's where you can ambush him," Christian advised.

"Psh, he'll probably just hire someone to come down here and fix them," John Cena informed them, putting a damper on things.

"Well, with the cameras being off, you can capture the people who come, and Vince won't know a thing. Then, he'll get pissed when his guys don't respond, and come down himself. That's when everything comes together," Maven interjected.

"I'm liking what I'm hearing," Shelton Benjamin said, smiling.

"But, what will we do with him when he comes?" Layla asked everyone.

"I've got an idea about that," Maria said, smirking. Everyone, again, gaped at her.

"You came up with an idea? There's no way," Torrie Wilson said with a giggle.

"Oh, shut the hell up. What's your idea, Maria?" Lita exclaimed. Everyone was floored. Lita had actually stood up for Maria. Torrie crossed her arms in a huff.

"Hornswoggle. Is there any way you can make the rides stop running themselves? You know, where a person would have to run them?" Maria said, ignoring what Torrie said.

"Probably. Why?" Hornswoggle replied.

"I say we give Vinnie Mac a little ride," Maria said evilly, rubbing her hands together.

"I like the way you think," John Cena told the Diva, who blushed.

"Why, thank you," she replied, reviecing a dirty look from Torrie Wilson.

"We'll need the details, but so far, I like it," Lita said, giving Maria a high-five.

"You guys in?" Maria said to the three new prisoners, I mean inhabitants of Vinnieland.

"Count us in," Jericho said woozily.

"Great. Now, to get some sleep so we can start tomorrow. Everyone meet me here at 8 tomorrow morning so I can explain everything. I'm too tired now," Maria said with a yawn.

"Okay. Good job, girl," Cena told the exhausted Diva.

"Thanks," Maria said, with a glowing smile. Torrie watched from a distance, and pulled Jillian Hall aside.

"You know, I don't really like the way John and Maria are talking. I'd say it's time to cause a little jealousy," Torrie said, slyly. Jillian looked intrigued.

"What'd you have in mind?" Jillian asked, anticipating Torrie's answer.

"Oh, I've got something up my sleeve," Torrie said, grinning mischievously. She didn't noticed Maria standing beside her.

"You don't have sleeves, silly! You're wearing spaghetti straps!" The bubbly Diva told Torrie. Torrie rolled her eyes and walked away, arm-in-arm with John.

**A/N:** Oh snap. Poor Maria. LOL, I feel sorry for everyone making fun of her, so I tried to make her slightly smarter in this chapter. What does Torrie have in store for Maria? And what do the Superstars have in store for Vince? You'll have to tune in to the next 'Vinnieland' chapter to see! xD Love all you guys! Ciao!


	8. Pool Partay

**Sticking Together In Vinnieland**

**Chapter 8 - Pool Partay**

**A/N:** HEHE, title is self explanatory. WOOT WOOT!!! Um, yeah, sorry I haven't updated in FOREVER. I'm homeschooled and GET NO SUMMER BREAK :(

**Disclaimer:** Don't own the wrestlers or the lyrics. They're from the Great Escape by Boys Like Girls. Ironically named, huh?

**Chapter Summary:** The Superstars have a pool party. Oh Lord. We're all doomed. Meanwhile, is Torrie still plotting against Maria?

!#$&()+

"Man, I'm tired," Ken Kennedy said, wiping some sweat off his face.

"Yeah, me too," Melina said instantaneously. Suddenly, Bobby Lashley barged into the front of the restaurant, from the kitchen.

"Anybody else hot and tired of working?" He asked. As if robotically, they all shouted yes. And, as if on cue, the other groups soon filled the restaurant, in desperate need of refreshment.

"That sun is completely brutal. Why the hell are we all suffering from heatstroke when we got a huge pool in the waterpark?" Christian asked, exasperated.

"Hey! I've got an idea!" Maria squealed. Torrie rolled her eyes from within the crowd. Trish caught this and hit her in the arm.

"What's that, Maria?" Trish asked.

"Let's have a pool party!!!" Maria yelled, excitedly. The whole crowd (except for Torrie, Kane and the Undertaker) hooted and hollered for a few minutes.

"Hells yeah. That's what I'm talking about! I knew I always liked you!" Edge said, draping an arm around Maria and giving her a noogie.

"But you called me a bimbo once," Maria said, a little saddened by the memory. Edge looked as if he were about to say something, but claimed his innocence.

"That's a compliment, though!" He replied, having outwitted her once again.

"Really?! Thanks!" Maria squealed.

"TO THE POOL!" Hornswoggle shouted.

At once, everyone shuffled out of the building making a run for the water park. As they all ran, they stripped off random articles of clothing. Good thing they were all wearing skivvies! It was a funfilled moment, and a funny scene, at that. Some people were tripping while they were trying to undress and run at the same time. People who were successful in doing so often turned around to laugh at them.

_**Tonight will change our lives**_

_**It's so good to be by your side**_

_**We'll cry**_

_**We won't give up the fight**_

_**We'll scream out at the top**_

_**of our lungs**_

_**And they'll think it's**_

_**just 'cause we're young and**_

_**We'll feel so alive**_

Most of them jumped straight into the pool when they approached it. Some of them looked a bit cautious, spotting a "hidden" camera near by.

"What the hell are you guys waiting on?" CM Punk asked them. One of them was Kelly Kelly. She looked from him to the camera.

"Vince is watching! I'm a bit worried about how he might manage the situation," she said, chewing on her bottom lip.

Trish Stratus, who was already wet from head to toe climbed out of the pool. She laughed and flipped the camera off with both hands.

"Manage this, **BITCH**!" She screamed to the camera. She then proceeded to throw Kelly into the pool before jumping back in herself. Many people shouted "WOOO!" when she did this, one of them was, of course, the Nature Boy.

"Yay this is fun!" Maria shouted, jumping up and down in the shallow end of the pool. She recieved a dirty look from Torrie, but was unaware of it.

"So, what are you planning?" Jillian asked her, slipping into the pool beside her.

"Well, since she has a cute little plan that John is _soo_ impressed by, I could call Vince and tell him everything after I hear what's going on," Torrie said with a sly smirk.

"Um, you'd better not! I don't know about you, but I want revenge on him!" Jillian said, giving her a deranged look.

"Well, I could just expose her for the little tramp she is. Set something up I guess," Torrie sighed, as if it were no big deal.

Little did the devious Diva know, Ashley, Trish and Lita were having a splash contest quite close to her and Jillian and heard everything. They exchanged shocked looks.

"Omigosh!" Said Mickie James from another group of people. She'd obviously heard it also.

"She's gonna ruin everything just because she hates Maria!" Ashley said so quickly, it was hard to understand.

"What?" Kane asked the mumbling Diva. He hadn't heard a damn thing.

"Nothing. Haven't you learned by bunking with me that I'm as crazy as you are and sometimes talk to myself?!" Ashley yelled, exasperated. Kane gave her a strange look, but then a smile.

"Yes, I have," he said, staring off into space as if he were daydreaming. Ashley rolled her eyes and continued chatting with the other girls.

"What should we do?" Trish asked.

"Just keep an eye on her, I guess. Make sure she can't do anything. If things get too out of hand, we'll just tell everyone what she's up to," Ashley responded, now that Kane was out of earshot.

"I think we should devise a little plan of our own to get John and Maria together," Lita giggled.

"Hey! Nice thinking. They so like each other. And Torrie would so deserve it," Trish replied, adding a scowl. Suddenly, Jeff came up behind her and wrapped his arms around her middle, causing her to freak out.

"Chicken fight!" Ashley yelled, motioning for Kane to come over, so she could get on his shoulders. Trish got up on Jeff's as well. The two girls battled it out, with Ashley eventually being knocked off of Kane's shoulders first.

"WOOOOOO!" Trish yelled, followed by a laughing fit.

"Hey. Stop stealing the Nature Boy's lines. WOO!" Ric Flair told her, from a lounge chair at the side of the pool.

"Who thinks we need some music?!" John Cena asked the group. Jillian gasped.

"I could sing!" She exclaimed.

"NOOO!" The entire group yelled back at her.

Suddenly, they heard a loud voice.

"Yo, yo, yo. Pop a fo-tay and check yo rollay, it's Cryme Tyme!" The voice exclaimed.

Then, as expected, a convertible rolled up next to the pool with two men in it, who were recognized by the Superstars as JTG and Shad.

"What the hell are you guys doing here?" Triple H asked them, holding Kenny Dykstra under the water.

"Yo, yo, yo, yo ,yo ,yo ,yo, **Yo**, **YO**. What's _really_ hood?" JTG said, stumbling around, resembling the Sandman during his matches.

"What's _really hood_?" Maria repeated, trying to calculate something.

"Yeah, girl, you be gettin' it," Shad told the beautiful red-head.

"No, really! What does _really hood_ mean?" She asked, confused. Before JTG could answer, Edge cut him off.

"Hey, you guys have a car. Turn on the radio!" He shouted, the remainder of the crowd agreeing with him.

"Oh, so ya'll want us to turn on the radio?" Shad asked the group, inching over to the car. They received a loud, consensual 'YEAH!'

"Well, we have a special today on that very radio. We will give you a full hour of musical satisfaction...for twenty dollars!" He continued, receiving odd looks from the Superstars.

"You're going to charge us twenty dollars just for listening to the radio?" Trish asked, annoyed.

"Honey, you know how we do. It's all about dat money, money, yeah, yeah. Money, money, yeah, yeah-" JTG stated, before Trish cut him off.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah G-money, just take the cash and shut the hell up," Trish sighed, handing him a twenty dollar bill.

"OH MY GOSH! I just got a call from Stephanie!" Candice yelled from pool side, nearly dropping her phone in the pool.

"What'd she say?" Mr. Kennedy asked, wondering what had surprised Candice so much.

"Vince just got served with a paternity suit by the state of Conneticut! He has an illegitimite child!" She squealed. Every single Superstar burst out laughing at Vince's misfortune.

I swear, not a one of them had a straight voice...until--

"It's one of us!" Candice added with a scream, shutting each and every one of them up.

They all gaped at her, looking like they had all just been shot in the foot.

Things were certainly about to get more interesting.

**A/N:** HEHE, how awesome had Raw been the past two weeks? I'm almost glad for that ratings slump they suffered. They're finally making Raw good again. And how funny is this new Vince storyline? I had to get it in this fic! It was imperative. Anyways, I'll try to update ASAP. Ciao!


	9. Place Ya Bets

**Sticking Together In Vinnieland**

**Chapter 9 - Place Ya Bets**

**A/N:** HEHEHE, this is gonna be fun to write. -cheesygrin- I know that Johnny Nitro changed his wrestling name to John Morrison, but I'm still gonna refer to him as Johnny Nitro so no one gets confused. This will be kind of short, but really silly. Silly is good when it comes to fics like these! Sorry if I offend anyone with who I make fun of in this chapter. If it bothers ya, simply click the 'Back' button on your browser and all will be well. I really don't need you to tell me it may be wrong. I know it's wrong, but...-My Heart Will Go On by Celine Dion plays- IT FEELS SO RIGHT!!! -bursts into tears-

**Disclaimer:** HEE, nope. Don't own a damn thing.

**Chapter Summary:** The Superstars bet on who Vince's illegitiment child is. Who can it be?

!#$&() 

After the pool party ended, and everyone was still reeling from the shock of finding out that one of them had Vince as their daddy, the Superstars went back to the hotel, planning to relax in the lounge.

"Well, we know it ain't Ric Flair," Johnny Nitro chuckled, pointing at the Nature Boy.

"WOOO! Thank the Lord! I would probably have a stroke," Ric Flair stated, turning purple as he did whenever he performed any strenuous activity. In this case, it was breathing and talking at the same time.

"You have problems breathing and talking at the same time, too?!" Maria questioned him, looking dumbfounded.

"I bet it's Edge. There's no way he has that goofy hair and isn't a bastard," Kane chuckled, seating himself beside Ashley.

"Oh, he's a bastard either way," Ashley responded, crossing her arms.

"Or maybe it's you, freak-a-leak," Edge gloated, looking proud.

"Watch it, Justin Timberflake," Kane threatened, which made Edge pee his pants. No, seriously. He actually peed himself.

"I bet it's Trailer Park Trish," Jillian Hall giggled, which gained a few laughs from some of the more unpopular people.

"Or maybe it's you Belly Clarkson. When's the last time you went to the gym?" Trish sighed, pinching Jillian's stomach.

"There's no need to debate the fact. Steph said she'd call me back when they found out which one of us it is," Candice Michelle informed the group.

"Until then, let's work on the plan!" Maria suggested, but there was a certain two businessmen who disagreed.

"No way, Ree-Ree. It's time to make that money, money, yeah, yeah," JTG said rhythmically. A few of the Superstars clapped along as he sang this for a while.

"Dat money, money."

"Yeah, yeah," Kane finished. It was safe to say everyone was shocked and amused that Kane was singing along with Cryme Tyme. Kane was surprised too, and scowled at the fact.

"I said nothing," he sneered. And at that, everyone agreed with him.

"Anyways, we about to make some g's. What we gonna do right here," JTG began, "Right hizzere," Shad finished.

"We gonna place bets on who Vinnie Mac's chitlin is. Then, he won't be Vinnie Mac to them. He'll be Daddy Mac. But the point is, we gonna party like we in Brooklyn and gamble 'til the po-po come and break it up," Shad explained to the group.

"Sounds fun," Maria giggled, trying to hide her confusion.

"Yeah, yeah it is. So, for all who think Edge is Vinnie's chitlin, come on down and place ya bets right here," JTG instructed. Kane came rushing up to them, laying down a thousand dollars instantly.

"Uh oh, Big Reddy seems pretty confident that it's the Premachar Superstar," Shad stated.

"It's the Rated R Superstar," Edge corrected, with a few people snorting with laughter behind him.

"Not according to Lita..." Shad trailed off innocently. Lita slid up to him secretively.

"Put me down for fifty on Edge," she whispered, winking at him.

"You got it Li," Shad replied, snatching the money out of her hand.

"Okay, for everybody who thinks it's Jillian Hall, come place da dough on da table," JTG announced. Jillian received many more takers. Including...Taker.

"There's no way she was born under normal circumstances with that voice," Ashley considered, heading up to the table to put down five-hundred on Jillian.

"I'm pretty sure it's Mr. Kennedy. He and Vince have something in common. Two very...ahem..._big_ attributes," Kristal announced, receiving a smirk from Kennedy.

"You mean banana and grapefruits?" He asked with a smug smile and chuckle.

"No...ego and mouth," she sighed, rolling her eyes.

"Hang on guys, my cell is ringing!" Candice declared, and as she answered, many Superstars crowded around her to hear the news.

Once Candice hung up with Stephanie, everyone was eager to hear the news.

"So, who is it?!" Jeff Hardy demanded, and many random people were praying it wasn't them.

"They don't know yet...but I do have some interesting news..." Candice explained, with an indecisive smile.

"What is it?" Chris Masters inquired.

"Whoever it turns out to be will get a first-class ticket out of this place," Candice stated loudly, causing scattered gasps among the group.

"I hope it's me!" Shawn Michaels exclaimed in a high-pitched voice, resembling a child on Christmas.

"Ew," Triple H commented, disapproving of his friend's behavior.

"As much as I'd love to get out of here, being Satan's spawn really isn't worth it," Trish decided, crossing her arms.

"This is pretty much a lose-lose situation. If you are Vince's kid, you'll get to get out of here...but you'll be related to the most evil force on the planet. If you aren't Vince's kid, you'll be stuck in here," Bobby Lashley reflected.

"Hell, at least being in here is temporary. If you're related to Vince...that's permanent," The Undertaker said with a growl.

"We _think_ this is temporary. Knowing Vince, and wishing I didn't, he's probably planning to keep us locked in here forever," Lita sighed, rolling her eyes.

"It won't matter...we have the plan," Maria giggled.

"Which is still in the early stages, but never mind that. I think that..._Hornswoggle_ is Vince's illegitimate kid!" Chris Jericho spoke up, pointing an accusing finger at the little guy. Everyone looked at him like he was crazy.

"Yeah, and you're behind the SAVEUS.222 videos!" Hornswoggle shot back, laughing until he was rolling around on the floor. Everyone burst out laughing at this, even Jericho.

"Yeah, like Jericho could come up with that," Shelton Benjamin chuckled, crossing his arms.

"Well, not Jericho. The WWE Creative Team," Jazz replied, attempting to shed some light on the issue.

"Haha, yeah! Like the _WWE Creative Team_ could come up with that! And I'm having sexual relations with Charlie Haas," Shelton shot back, only to cover up his mouth awkwardly.

"I knew it!" Melina squealed, throwing her arms in the air. Charlie crossed his arms and avoided everyone's eyes, looking embarrassed.

"I told you not to tell," he cried, in a very unmanly voice, before running out of the room like Rosie O'Donnell in pursuit of an ice cream truck.

Trish and Lita wore similar expressions: wide eyes and pursed lips that were struggling to keep closed to prevent laughter.

"That was...mmhmm," Batista stammered, pulling Melina onto his lap.

Just then, Candice's cell phone began to ring, making all noises in the room cease to exist. Everyone's eyes widened at the sound, as thought they were all seeing something shocking.

Candice took a deep breath and hesitated for a moment, before clicking the phone open.

"Tell Steph I said hello," Triple H said in a very innocent voice. Candice rolled her eyes.

"Hi, Steph. Any news on the paternity situation?" She asked, as nervous as everyone else. She gasped after Stephanie's response, and looked toward a small cluster of Superstars containing Jeff Hardy, Hornswoggle and Trish Stratus.

They simultaneously screamed "OH GOD, NO!!!!!"

"Sorry Horni, it's you," Candice said sadly, as though she were telling him he were dying. He looked at the floor, defeated. Maria instantly stood up.

"No! He can't go! We need him for the plan! He's the only one who knows how to shut the cameras off!" She yelled, on the verge of crying.

Suddenly, a group of what appeared to be bodyguards dressed in black crashed through each of the entrances, setting their sights on Hornswoggle.

He cringed, but glanced at Maria with strong and proud eyes.

"Don't worry. I'll find a way back in here," he said, with a smile, as the bodyguards lifted him up by each arm with ease. She smiled back at him, but was still heartbroken on the inside. John looked sad also, placing a comforting hand on her shoulder. This earned him a scowl from Torrie.

Ashley sighed, disappointed that one of the roommates she'd grown so fond of was leaving her.

"See ya when you get back, Horni," she said positively, knowing he'd keep his word. He grinned and waved at her.

"Bye everybody," he said in a loud voice. There was scattered farewells, and almost everyone looked saddened by the occurence. Maria especially. She turned to John forcefully.

"What are we gonna do?" She exclaimed, past the point of crying, and now sobbing. Of all people, being locked up in this place had pushed _her_ past the breaking point. It surprised a lot of people. John pulled her into a tight hug, and rubbed her back softly.

Things had just taken a turn for the worst.

**A/N:** GAH I finally updated! I know, it seemed like it was never gonna happen. Sorry bout that. But at least I did. I had lost my passion for wrestling for quite a while, but the fifteenth anniversary special actually brought some of it back. Hopefully, I'll be able to get the Best of Raw DVD, and that'll really help. I love looking back at the way wrestling used to be. Anyways, I love you guys very much, and I hope you all have a very happy Valentine's Day! Ciao!


	10. Superstars Find Religion: AKA MySpace

**Sticking Together In Vinnieland**

**Chapter 10 - Superstars Find Religion: AKA MySpace**

**A/N:** Uh ohz. After the last chapter, what could I possibly have in store for the Superstars of Vinnieland?! Keep on reading to find out xD

**Disclaimer:** I'm gonna make this super short. No, I do not own World Wrestling Entertainment. Do you want to know why? Because, I have attempted several times to purchase it from Vincent Kennedy McMahon, or as you may know him: Satan, but he simply will not agree to my terms. And, I also cannot afford it, because I'm poor... :-) Hope you enjoyed that short disclaimer. Have a nice DAY!

P.S. I also do not, under any circumstances, own MySpace. BANG! BANG!

**Chapter Summary:** Hornswoggle may be gone, but the Superstars finally locate his computer! They find someone through his e-mail that may be able to help them!

!#&()+

"Could you explain that again? I fell asleep," Triple H complained to Maria, who had just finished explaining her plan to everyone. She found this slightly tiring and annoying, given everything the group had been through, but she complied to explain again.

"Well, here's how it was _gonna_ go: Hornswoggle was supposed to take out the cameras, We'd have some people stand watch at all possible entrances of the park. If anyone came to try to fix them, whoever's around would simply take them down to the hotel basement, tie them up, and leave them there. While some people were doing that, another group would be 'pimping out the rides' shall we say, making them completely unfit to ride. When Vince finally came down to find out what happened to the cameras, we would tell him how hard we've been working and convince him to ride the rides we...ahem..._fixed_ up and let him experience a bit more than he intended. But of course, it's all screwed up now that Hornswoggle's gone." Maria informed them, still upset.

"I definitely like it. Could we kill him?" Undertaker asked, hopefully.

"Um, Taker, I think that'd be taking it a bit far. All we were aiming for was to make Vince regret putting us in here," Lita told the Deadman, tracing a finger over his chest. Edge just stood by, a wildly jealous look in his eyes.

"Maybe we don't need Hornswoggle. Maybe we just need his computer. Where is it?" Trish Stratus asked.

"He kind of...lost it," Ashley informed the group, sadly.

"What?! But we can't do this without it! Even if we did have Horni," Maria exclaimed, approaching the group with a saddened expression.

"Don't worry Maria, I'm sure we'll find it," John Cena told her reassuringly. Torrie grimaced from behind him.

"Don't count on it. You can blame Ashley for the mess in our room that it's lost in," Kane said, arching an eyebrow. Ashley looked livid.

"Why are you so fucking hateful?!" Ashley asked him.

"Because it's fun," Kane replied, giving her an evil grin.

"Well, cut it out," she responded, crossing her arms threateningly.

"Or what? You can't hurt me," Kane said, chuckling.

"Oh, I can do things. You're the one who told me how evil my mind was," Ashley said with a cold stare, inching closer to him. This actually unnerved the Big Red Machine a bit, but he tried not to let it show.

"Get a room," Edge said, rolling his eyes.

"Oh shut up," Lita told him.

"Don't talk to me like that. Why don't you and your little boyfriend the Undertaker just go to hell?" Edge shot back, giving Lita a look that scared her. Undertaker stepped in front of her protectively.

"I'd suggest you step off, boy," he said in a growling voice.

"Everybody shut up! You see what's happening? We're all fighting, again!" Maria shouted over everyone's bickering.

"She's right! Let's just go look for the damn computer," Finlay said, rolling his eyes.

"Or better yet, let's just forget Maria's plan. It's stupid," Torrie said, crossing her arms. Everyone looked at her like they wanted to kill her.

"Like to see you come up with something better," Jeff Hardy said sarcastically.

"Oh, quiet down, Skittles," Torrie retorted, referring to Jeff's multi-colored hair.

"Torrie, just shut the fuck up. You think no one overheard your little chat with Jillian yesterday?! Me, Ashley and Lita did. So if you do anything to screw this plan up, you'll have all of us to deal with," Trish yelled at Torrie.

"Yeah," Ashley said, coming to stand next to Trish. Everyone looked at Lita, expecting her to want no part of the situation, but she went and stood firmly next to Trish, Ashley and Maria.

"I'd suggest you get over your little ego problem," the redhead told Torrie.

"Maybe I don't want to. Maybe I don't even wanna take part in this stupid ass project," Torrie said, dropping her eyes to the floor. Everyone gave her a death glare, making no movements and not breaking eye contact.

"Oh, so you're all against me?" Torrie declared, placing her hands on her hips.

"No. You're just against all of us," John said, giving her a disapproving look.

"This isn't even because of the plan. It's just because Maria came up with it," Maven said, shaking his head.

"Why do you hate me?" Maria asked Torrie, developing tears in her eyes.

"Because. I see the way you and John flirt all the time. Get it through your head that he's mine, you little bitch!" Torrie screamed.

"You should've known that I liked you and didn't want anyone else. But that's over now," John said, an intensely disappointed look on his face.

"Oh, I know you did not just break up with me!" Torrie yelled, looking crazed.

"Oh, I think he just did," Melina scowled, leading the group away from the shocked Diva.

The rest of the day lagged on, everyone avoiding Torrie and hoping to come up with a new plan that she was not in on.

"Guys, we can't tell her anything. She'd probably call Vince and tell him everything. We have to come up with something else. Something that's less obvious," Trish informed the group.

"There's no way we can live right here with her and her not know anything," Jazz argued.

"Good point. Maybe we can get her out somehow?" Trish suggested.

"If we do, it'd be difficult. Great, we'd have to come up with another brilliant plan," Ashley whined, placing her forehead in her hands.

Suddenly, Torrie came through the doorway.

"I've been thinking about it, and maybe we could do this plan. I think I found some stuff we could use on the rides," she said softly.

"You're really gonna help us?" Maria asked, a surprised smile on her face.

"Yeah, I mean, we're in this together, right?" Torrie replied, also smiling. There was a lot of "YES!" and "Thank goodness we don't have to come up with a new plan," going around the hotel lobby.

"Haha, yeah! So, what'd you find?" Maria asked, excitedly.

"There's a huge storage building over by the Ferris Wheel. It has a lot of tools and things," Torrie replied.

And so, the reunited group shuffled over to the storage building Torrie had located, finding hundreds of different tools and random other knick knacks.

"Hehe, a blowtorch," Kane stated happily, holding up a metal instrument, which emitted a blue flame when he pressed a button.

"I'll be taking that. I don't trust you," Ashley told him, relieving him of the possibly destructive equipment, which made him frown.

"You ruin all the fun," he replied, crossing his arms.

"Where's Rey?" Shawn Michaels asked, glancing around.

"He went to find the looptop," Finlay answered, sifting through a pile of papers.

"That's _laptop_," Trish corrected him, before backing down when he showed her his teeth.

"I beeeen WUH-KINNNNN OHON the RAHAILROADDDDDD," Jillian screeched, causing everyone to hold their ears.

"SHUT THE FUCK UP!!" Maria yelled at Jillian, with an evil look on her face, causing everyone to back away in fear. They had never seen Maria use such assertion or language before. She tried to compose herself afterward, by looking through a pile of cardboard, wondering if she could use any of it.

"I found the computer!" Came a voice from outside, before Rey Mysterio popped through the door with high energy.

"Yippee kay ay!" Shawn Michaels screeched, before making the motion of riding a horse. Fighting the urge to make fun of him, everyone turned their attention to Rey.

Rey sat the computer on a wooden table in the corner of the building and turned the power on. The device loaded pretty quickly to the desktop, which the divas were horrified by and the men were quite pleased by.

Hornswoggle's background image was a picture of Candice Michelle who was wearing nothing but a pair of sunglasses.

"Whoa," Jeff Hardy grunted, before being punched in the stomach by Trish, who wore an angry expression.

"I was just gonna say that it's completely inappropriate," he quickly covered, rubbing the sore spot on his stomach.

Candice simply blushed and pulled a window up to cover the image.

"I wasn't done seeing the selection of Candy," Triple H joked, tickling her on the shoulder.

"Can we just hurry up and do this?" Maria groaned, annoyed with everyone at this point.

"Damn, Hornswoggle's got a LOT of unanswered e-mail, and luckily, we don't need his password to check them. He's already signed in!" Chris Jericho vocally noted, receiving a scowl from Torrie.

"We're not using his computer to spy on him and hack his e-mail account. We're using it to get us out of here!" She responded, placing her hands on her hips.

"Well, maybe Chris has a point. Maybe his e-mail can help us somehow," Maria said thoughtfully, opening his inbox.

"Maybe we can contact him, and he can tell us what to do!" Ashley pondered, leaning against Kane and making him look uncomfortable. Everyone was on edge at seeing who had e-mailed Hornswoggle so much, and was damn sure hoping this person could be of help to him.

Everyone looked baffled, turning their heads sideways when they saw the name. The dozens of unanswered e-mails were sent by someone named 'Hornsquiggle'. There was stifled laughter throughout the group, and some stupidity.

"That name sounds kinda like something I heard before! I wonder where I heard it," Kelly Kelly thought out loud. She was smacked in the back of the head by a monotonously annoyed Ken Kennedy, who passed her as he did so.

"What is that...Horni's brother?" Maria asked, genuinely stumped, as was everyone else.

"No, his cousin..." Finlay corrected her, causing everyone to look at him oddly.

"How do you know?" Triple H inquired, suspecting something other than what he knew Finlay would say.

"Oh -- erm, uh...well, holy hobgoblins! What do ye expect? We were partners for a right damn while..." Finlay trailed off, as though he were definitely hiding something.

But, no one had time to question him further, for they suspected that this cousin of Hornswoggle's...this 'Hornsquiggle' could be of use to them.

"Click on the most recent e-mail!" Trish instructed Rey, who did as she told him.

It read: Were teh hellz hav u ben cuz? i mailed u lyk...a kadjillion tymz!! hit me baq on Myspace, betch!! my url thingy is /hornsquiggleisaballa

ya cuz

Horni numba 2

The wrestlers tried like hell to decipher the cryptic message, and finally cracked it with the help of Kelly Kelly, who was quite computer lingo savvy.

"Just, like, click the link he put in the e-mail! Duh..." she said boredly, as though it were obvious, before checking her fingernails for flaws.

"Guys? I think we need to check out his Myspace..." Jeff suggested.

**A/N:** Look! A cliffhanger! HAHAHAHAHAHA...cough choke sputter Ewan McGreggor Anyway...read, review, stay tuned and all that jazz! Ciao!

**xoxo Trishy**


End file.
